It was over before I knew it had begun
His hand-
And then not.

He was smiling.
Caustic, loud, pretty.
A pretty boy. Something
Was missing in his eyes, maybe-

I never finish the maybe.
It hurts to wonder. The stars
Never
Wonder if they are satellites. The point is

I am here.
Lonely
Tired
Scared
Why should I care about enthalpy when entropy will
Take it all away?

That doesn't sound nice.
An emptiness more quiet than my heart.
Only my memories to keep me company, memories of
Him

I didn't ask for it, I
Swear he never even
Asked. We were talking
Just
Friends
And then-

He-
And his hand-

Whiplash. I could feel my soul
Age a thousand years in the course of a
Moment. Goodbye those days of
Peaceful bliss, of feeling
Safe.

I know there is a light inside me
But
When he-
A piece broke off,
Gone,
Swallowed by the inky depths.

Is it too late to say no?