It’s the shrill squeak of the Farris wheel in the background;
And the perfume of the ocean in the summer time.
It’s the heavy breathing after rough-housing;
And the rumpled sheets that get scrubbed in the morning.

It’s the way he grips you bare against him at night;
And the way he grins when he wakes up to you.
It’s the way you lay, your head on his chest, his hand on the tender owner of your heartbeat;
And the way his eyes declare you, see through you, and warm you.

It’s the fierce emotion between intimate lovers;
And the relieving pleasure of a shared cigarette after.
It’s the way he shows you off to his friends, putting you on the spot for everyone to admire;
And the riveting electricity that runs through your body from only a kiss.

Adrenaline in your veins from contact,
Excitement from a tingle in your body,
Discovery of comfort in revealed lips,
Appreciation in a form of design in your presence.

Lying next to him is not the same as lying next to you;
Trying to make myself believe it’s really you next to me.
Your kisses, your warmth, your caress, your care;
That is what made me.

He doesn’t acknowledge me the way you did;
And he doesn’t make me feel considered like you did.
He doesn’t satisfy me the way you did;
And he doesn’t make me feel wanted when I look into his eyes.

With him, I feel hollow;
With you, I feel common.
I feel alluring.
I feel adored, vital, and desired.

But you’re misplaced;
And I’ve taken a new path.
A path where you won’t find me;
Because I’ve hidden myself from you.

The irritation of my insecurities;
The agony of tears burning my face making me appear weak;
The cries of my soul;
The illness of loving you; is gone. 

My heart now coexisting in fury, solitude, and disorientation;
It is turmoil.
I do not know myself, I do not know my own heart;
My mind always a racing game.

Leave affection on my neck;
Leave devotion in my ultrasound;
Leave respect in my ring;
Leave love in my heart.