I have had dreams where you have held me in your arms again, telling me it's okay
I have had dreams of kissing you one last time before disappearing into consciousness again
I have listened as you talk, and read between your lines as you tell me you are tired
I have watched the tightrope snap slowly
I have listened to myself and in the cracks of my voice, the stitches holding everything together break one by one
I have felt the sting of your words against my skin like cold rain
And against my heart like straight pins
I have watched as I drift from the docks of comfort and you watch with no depth perception as I disappear over a waterfall of doubt.
I have felt the tears on my cheeks roll and watched as they stain paper, smudging ink of a written confession of a crush
I have spent hours balancing on a tightrope between the sun and the moon not seeing an end to a bloody sunset before dark falls over my eyes and through my heart.
I have cried over the loss of you, and the confusion and worry that comes with trying to hard to hold on to something that's already gone.
I have told no one but myself the feelings that plague me, burying my heart in the dirt of my soul
Covering it up makes it worse, but letting it out makes noise that nobody listens to, so even if I did say anything, who would listen to a teen, falling apart from relationships they don't understand what love is, only because we're young