Mom, I’m Gay | Teen Ink

Mom, I’m Gay MAG

By Anonymous

     I remember that day when I proudly stated, “Mom, I’m gay.” I felt liberated - until I realized that she wanted to push me out of the car. Liberation, all right. Good thing I wasn’t liberated from my seat belt.

I’ve always been one to test the waters. Sometimes the outcome is good, like admitting I’m gay, and sometimes the outcome is tragic, like that haircut in third grade.

I decided to tell her that night because she was mad at me already. Yes, and my parents call me the smart child. I felt the need to test the limits again. Besides, how much deeper could I dig myself?

Well, it turns out, pretty far.

“Mom, I’m gay.”

The car swerved to the left. Honk. Then to the right. Beep. As she straightened out, I realized I had just blabbed the secret of a lifetime; some people keep this inside their whole lives while I blurted it out on a car ride to my therapist’s office.

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes, I am,” I responded, just for the sake of contradicting her. “Look, I’m going out on a limb to tell you. It’s not easy for me.” Well, there it was. It just came out. Once I got going, it was pretty easy.

“I just want you to be normal. Don’t you want to be normal?”

“I do! This has nothing to do with being normal!” An argument. Things were getting interesting.

“Then fix it. Don’t be gay!”

Oh, if I could have screamed, I would have! Fix it? There’s nothing to be fixed! Toilets need to be fixed! My sexuality? Nope! Being gay isn’t something I could do anything about. I was mad, so I huffed and puffed in silence as she drove, white-knuckled, down the highway.

At the therapist’s office, I bawled about how unlucky I was to have a mother who lacked understanding, was uncaring and was a bad driver. The therapist called my mom in, saying the three of us needed to talk. I sensed a fiasco.

Mom walked in with a fake smile. I wanted to tell her to wipe it off, but that wasn’t what we were here for. She sat next to me and I started analyzing her every move. Okay, she sat down next to me. That’s good. Extra long blink. Not good. She doesn’t even want to look at me. She’s shifting in her seat. She’s uncomfortable. Or maybe she’s trying to get closer to me. Or farther away.

“Hello? Earth to you, dear.”

“Umm.” Perfect. I felt like an idiot. My therapist was being paid huge amounts of money to hear me say umm and analyze my mother’s every move? I was so busy looking at my mom that I’d completely missed what my therapist had been saying.

“I think you know that Mom loves you no matter what. And Mom, this isn’t an attention thing. I’ve known this for a while. It’s no big secret.” Well, not anymore!

We went home that evening pretending nothing had happened. I was careful not to distract my mother.

And today? Well, we’re getting along. I’ve learned to love the fact that I like girls and am secure in my sexuality, I’ve been able to tell other people. I’m not ashamed anymore. It’s who I am. Just like I’ll always mismatch my socks, I’ll always have a weakness for underwear shopping and hazelnut coffee, and I’ll always like girls. My mother may not exactly love it, but she can deal. But just wait until I bring home my first girlfriend!

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This article has 196 comments.

on Nov. 1 2010 at 4:45 pm
BeautyandBeast BRONZE, St.Peters, Missouri
4 articles 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
Mom: I learned my lesson, I had three of you!
Daughter: You didn't learn your lesson, you had three of us!!! lol :D

this article was really moving, i almost started crying, it was really good

on Oct. 30 2010 at 7:51 pm
That's terrible! But sad thing is, that I think my dad would do the same thing.

on Oct. 30 2010 at 5:44 pm
ZombieDanceWithMe SILVER, Rockford, Illinois
7 articles 1 photo 98 comments

Favorite Quote:
“To die is nothing; but it is terrible not to live”

-Victor Hugo

this article was great! I read this and thought abut when I told my mom I was Bi, she excepted it, but I know she didn't approve. 

This was also very funny. Great job. I loved it!

on Oct. 30 2010 at 5:40 pm
ZombieDanceWithMe SILVER, Rockford, Illinois
7 articles 1 photo 98 comments

Favorite Quote:
“To die is nothing; but it is terrible not to live”

-Victor Hugo

Yea, the day of silence is when you are ust quiet all day. It's like "don't talk bad about gays, I wont." Kinda thing. I have done it every year since 6th grade. It's really fun too!

sab102 BRONZE said...
on Oct. 26 2010 at 9:23 am
sab102 BRONZE, Plaquemine, Louisiana
1 article 0 photos 3 comments
I enjoyed how this article was to the point, witty, and extremely thought-provoking. Telling mothers secrets is a difficult feat for teens now-a-days. The fact that we're beginning to discuss such important matters shows that we are growing, and I'm proud of this. Keep growing in whichever sexuality you have. 

on Sep. 16 2010 at 7:20 pm
Karma_Chameleon SILVER, English, Indiana
8 articles 0 photos 236 comments

Favorite Quote:
To be able to say "I love you" one must first be able to say "I" - Ayn Rand

Great piece! Both entertaining and thought provoking, and very well written. Love it!

on Sep. 7 2010 at 6:18 pm
Flightless GOLD, Sioux Falls, South Dakota
13 articles 1 photo 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If it's all you've got embrace it." and "Anything is possible"(But not everything is probable) :/

I LOVE your last reaction, that was hilarious! And ya, you are an inspiration! :)

on Sep. 5 2010 at 10:16 pm
gay_emo_skewl_boi_4_U BRONZE, Redington Shores, Florida
2 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
if you can do it, i can do it better!!!

ur an insperation!!!!

GamerGirl75 said...
on Jun. 22 2010 at 2:04 pm
GamerGirl75, Ontario, California
0 articles 0 photos 5 comments
I'm glad that you were able to just say it so proudly. I have a couple of friends who are either gay, lesbian, or bisexual and there's this thing called day of silence, which to my knowledge is about gay rights and I'd just like to tell everyone to do it. There's no better feeling than to know you're supporting such a good cause

on Jun. 20 2010 at 8:28 am
madilyne BRONZE, Lancaster, Wisconsin
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
being diffrent is one of the best things i have ever done with my life

good for you, that reminds me of my sister, she told my mom and she freaked out, adn my dad hasn't talked to her since(2 years)

on May. 29 2010 at 6:49 pm
allisonl97 BRONZE, =), Wisconsin
2 articles 0 photos 46 comments

Favorite Quote:
I dont really have a fav quote

WOW this is GREAT!!!!!

on May. 13 2010 at 11:54 pm
DarkKnight BRONZE, Winston Salem, North Carolina
1 article 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
If at first you don't succeed, beat those who did senseless!

This is an AWESOME article! I'm a dude and i'm bi, but i haven't told anyone yet. my mom has already given her opinions on gay, bi and lesbian people. she doesn't like them. you can only imagine what my dad would say. i haven't come out to them, and i don't think i ever will :( i am thinking about coming out to a couple of my friends, especially a guy i like who i think might be alright with it. :-) there are a few openly gay people that go to my school and i think they are brave to be themselves. i personally think gay people are NOT bad people because i have a gay friend and she doesn't act like peope expect gay people to act. my other friends are also okay with her and she'll even joke about herself being gay. overall, gay people rule, but bis can get it from both dudes and girls! ;-p

bazan13 BRONZE said...
on May. 7 2010 at 12:44 pm
bazan13 BRONZE, Gering, Nebraska
1 article 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
fear not for god is with us and we are the future

you know i am happy for you cause it takes alot of courage to come out and say that to your family i know that you must have been afraid and scared i know i would have been!




Tomboy GOLD said...
on May. 7 2010 at 10:30 am
Tomboy GOLD, Broken Arrow, Oklahoma
13 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The human heart had hidden treasures; in secret kept; in silence sealed; the thoughts; the hopes; the dreams; the pleasures; whose charms were broken if revealed" - Charlotte Bronte

Wether someone gay or not this artical is awesome in the fact it says just be proud of who you are.  sorry your mom didn't approve, i think its weird when people say that being gay isn't normal

on Apr. 15 2010 at 1:36 pm
DomtheBomb BRONZE, Springfield, Massachusetts
1 article 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure."--Marianne Williamson

good job! love yourself for who u are and eventually people will do the same

on Apr. 15 2010 at 12:40 pm
toxic.monkey SILVER, Tashkent, Other
6 articles 0 photos 210 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Homo homini lupus"

this was pretty funny and very serious at the same time! really good job! :D happy that you're feeling comfortable and peaceful about yourself

brandisky said...
on Apr. 13 2010 at 10:53 am
im bisexual, and one of my "friends" told everyone in the middle and high school, and i was being teased because of it, and am now homeschooled. im going back next year for highschool, and i have had a lot to think about during my homeschooling. i no longer care what people think, and my friends and family know, and they are proud of me. i respect you for telling your mom upfront about it. this was a great article.

on Mar. 25 2010 at 12:00 am
Swindlewick SILVER, ..., Washington
8 articles 2 photos 50 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I do not agree with what you have to say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." ~Voltaire

Great article! Your mom can build a bridge and get over it, eh?

samhns BRONZE said...
on Mar. 24 2010 at 11:10 pm
samhns BRONZE, Lathrop, California
2 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
The truth is everyone is going to hurt you. You just gotta find the ones worth suffering for. - bob marley

evry one at my skool thinkz being bi or gay or lez is bad. when they found out the new kid wuz bi they went crazy. i didnt care. even though u have a diff sexuality dosent mean ur an kool person

on Mar. 24 2010 at 4:02 pm
Lovely:) SILVER, Clarendon, Texas
5 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
Laugh as much as you breath and love as long as you live.

exactly my bff's are gay