Mom, I’m Gay | Teen Ink

Mom, I’m Gay MAG

By Anonymous

     I remember that day when I proudly stated, “Mom, I’m gay.” I felt liberated - until I realized that she wanted to push me out of the car. Liberation, all right. Good thing I wasn’t liberated from my seat belt.

I’ve always been one to test the waters. Sometimes the outcome is good, like admitting I’m gay, and sometimes the outcome is tragic, like that haircut in third grade.

I decided to tell her that night because she was mad at me already. Yes, and my parents call me the smart child. I felt the need to test the limits again. Besides, how much deeper could I dig myself?

Well, it turns out, pretty far.

“Mom, I’m gay.”

The car swerved to the left. Honk. Then to the right. Beep. As she straightened out, I realized I had just blabbed the secret of a lifetime; some people keep this inside their whole lives while I blurted it out on a car ride to my therapist’s office.

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes, I am,” I responded, just for the sake of contradicting her. “Look, I’m going out on a limb to tell you. It’s not easy for me.” Well, there it was. It just came out. Once I got going, it was pretty easy.

“I just want you to be normal. Don’t you want to be normal?”

“I do! This has nothing to do with being normal!” An argument. Things were getting interesting.

“Then fix it. Don’t be gay!”

Oh, if I could have screamed, I would have! Fix it? There’s nothing to be fixed! Toilets need to be fixed! My sexuality? Nope! Being gay isn’t something I could do anything about. I was mad, so I huffed and puffed in silence as she drove, white-knuckled, down the highway.

At the therapist’s office, I bawled about how unlucky I was to have a mother who lacked understanding, was uncaring and was a bad driver. The therapist called my mom in, saying the three of us needed to talk. I sensed a fiasco.

Mom walked in with a fake smile. I wanted to tell her to wipe it off, but that wasn’t what we were here for. She sat next to me and I started analyzing her every move. Okay, she sat down next to me. That’s good. Extra long blink. Not good. She doesn’t even want to look at me. She’s shifting in her seat. She’s uncomfortable. Or maybe she’s trying to get closer to me. Or farther away.

“Hello? Earth to you, dear.”

“Umm.” Perfect. I felt like an idiot. My therapist was being paid huge amounts of money to hear me say umm and analyze my mother’s every move? I was so busy looking at my mom that I’d completely missed what my therapist had been saying.

“I think you know that Mom loves you no matter what. And Mom, this isn’t an attention thing. I’ve known this for a while. It’s no big secret.” Well, not anymore!

We went home that evening pretending nothing had happened. I was careful not to distract my mother.

And today? Well, we’re getting along. I’ve learned to love the fact that I like girls and am secure in my sexuality, I’ve been able to tell other people. I’m not ashamed anymore. It’s who I am. Just like I’ll always mismatch my socks, I’ll always have a weakness for underwear shopping and hazelnut coffee, and I’ll always like girls. My mother may not exactly love it, but she can deal. But just wait until I bring home my first girlfriend!

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This article has 193 comments.

on May. 16 2011 at 7:51 pm
cavatina BRONZE, New York, New York
2 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
thanks a lot captain obvious

to consEcon: your comments are really annoying me

on May. 16 2011 at 7:49 pm
cavatina BRONZE, New York, New York
2 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
thanks a lot captain obvious

I dont think posting coments about it is avoiding the topic

on May. 16 2011 at 6:45 pm
the-girl-on-fire BRONZE, Castle Rock, Colorado
2 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever said sunshine is happiness has never danced in the rain.

Thank you! I love who I am and I don't need God to tell me otherwise!

on May. 4 2011 at 9:01 pm
HannahsEvolving SILVER, Crestwood, Kentucky
5 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
We stopped checking for monsters, when we realized they're inside of us. -Unknown author

<3 this is wonderfull

on Apr. 24 2011 at 12:53 am
P03tryPunk BRONZE, Delray Beach, Florida
3 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet. -Plato

Awesome article! Very well written. I agree with you 100% people should come out to their family more often. You will never know how they will react and how much theysupport and love you until you do. You should be whoever you want to be and no one can tell you different! Way to go girl!!!

on Apr. 24 2011 at 12:50 am
P03tryPunk BRONZE, Delray Beach, Florida
3 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet. -Plato

if you were trying to avoid the topic you wouldn't be posting on this article and it's not right to tell someone that they can't love whoever they please...what if i told you you can't love the person you do love...would you like that? idon't think so...let the girl live her life the way she wants can't tell her what to do

on Apr. 15 2011 at 6:32 pm
teacat749 BRONZE, Whitefish Bay, Wisconsin
4 articles 0 photos 151 comments

Favorite Quote:
We do not quit playing because we grow old. We grow old because we quit playing.
-Oliver Wendell Holmes

This is a wonderful article! :)

on Apr. 15 2011 at 4:33 pm
JoPepper PLATINUM, Annandale, Virginia
35 articles 0 photos 782 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Freedom is the ability to not care what the other person thinks."

"Not all those who wander are lost" --JRR Tolkien

"When you are listening to music it is better to cover your eyes than your ears." --Jose' Bergamin

I love this article. I believe everyone is allowed to love whoever they want.  No one should have the right to take that away!!! :)

aaliona SILVER said...
on Apr. 12 2011 at 4:29 pm
aaliona SILVER, Spencer, Iowa
5 articles 2 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Morning is a new sheet of paper for you to write on." ~Eve Merriam

Some people are posting really immature comments on this, but don't worry about that; all of them that I saw were anonymous. This was very well-written!

LaKayla SILVER said...
on Apr. 8 2011 at 10:27 am
LaKayla SILVER, Savona, New York
6 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
to love is nothing, to be loved is something, to love and be loved is everything

What this person feels is seriously not your concern. leave it alone. i'm sure everyone of you let your feelings out in a poem, or a song, something like that. let it be. no one should be judged anyway for anything.  congrats for a well written article.

on Apr. 6 2011 at 6:03 pm
MysteryHeart GOLD, Thorold, Other
14 articles 0 photos 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
Usted es especial! AKWARD!!! (in an opera like voice), ohhh fasha', what the huh?,who in the name of what?, sanity now!

I am not a religious person infact i hate it cause it kills people.... however i do have a Faith and beliefe in the Bible and in a God whom i know loves the whole world. I also know that as much as God made everyone and loves everyone He HATES SIN. and the Bible clearly states in the Book of Romans 1:22-32 that homosexuallity is and abomination to God. NO God did not make you this way!!!!!! He did make you, but He did not make you to lust over your own gender. when God created people in the garden of Eden it was Adam and Eve... not Adam and Steve.  Personally myself when i meet someone who is a homosexual i do not treat them like they are a disease or a freak of nature and i think that being mean to them and persecuting them for whathey stand for will only make them stronger. I know when i get persecuted for my faith it only makes me stronger. and i can tell you that treating them like crap will not work at getting them to change. It is only by showing them the love of Jesus( Saviour of the universe God's Only son) that will cause a repentant heart. So for all you homosexuals, lesbians, and bisexual people who might read this i just want to tell you that there is a God who made you and loves you. He sent his sone to die on the cross for your sins and even though you may not want to face up and admit that what you are doing is wrong i can admit for you that YOU ARE NOT HAPPY! in fact i bet you are miserable. Because even though you may have a "partner " you do not feel complete inside. You are empty, cold , alone, and some what bitter at the world. but there is a love that can fill your soul and feed your hunger and fix that broken heart filled with rejection, hurt, loss, depression. and that is the love of Jesus Christ. Repent before it is too late. If you died tomorrow do you know where you would go? Heaven? Hell? (Romans 1: 32) John 3:15-21. God loves you, Jesus Christ loves you. AND I LOVE YOU!!!!

on Apr. 5 2011 at 7:21 pm
writerchick2095 BRONZE, Lincolnton, North Carolina
4 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
'Why do you try so hard to fit in when you are born to stand out?'
'Three can keep a secret if two of them are dead.'

This is a really inspirational story. I've never had to experience something like this, but it's really a brave thing to do.

asofnow GOLD said...
on Apr. 2 2011 at 6:41 pm
asofnow GOLD, Troy, Michigan
18 articles 0 photos 209 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nothing gold can stay ~ Robert Frost

Ack! People are so mean! It's kinda sad really... I don't see why they have to be the one to judge, who ever gave them that role. I think I'll just watch the cards play out, anyways, this was a good article. I liked the writing style a lot.

lubymao said...
on Apr. 2 2011 at 5:54 am
lubymao, New York, California
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
how brave you are!

Hart said...
on Apr. 1 2011 at 2:55 pm
My religion says that it is wrong.  I don't hate homosexuals, i just don't think they are correct.

on Mar. 31 2011 at 10:23 pm
Carabear BRONZE, Lake Mexia, Texas
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Death? Why this fuss about death? Use your imagination, try to visualize a world without death!...Death is the essential condition of life, not an evil."-Charlotte Perkins Gilman

This is a place for teens to air their feelings and experiences, not for you to smash down their self-esteem, if you can't accept what different people think then leave the site!

Hart said...
on Mar. 20 2011 at 9:56 am
I believe homosexuality is wrong, but I don't discriminate against someone because of their orientation.  I just try to avoid the topic.

on Mar. 19 2011 at 1:19 pm
MiaMonster BRONZE, Los Alamos, New Mexico
3 articles 0 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I often wonder if life is easier for other people, or they're just better at faking it." -Unknown

why hate? its not your problem. god some people are so ignorant. 

on Mar. 19 2011 at 1:22 am
Laurennnn PLATINUM, Sadieville, Kentucky
31 articles 9 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people merely exist, that is all." -Oscar Wilde

This was a great article. Serious and witty. I came out recently, and it was really hard. I think it's great that you're comfortable with who you are, and I think that it's great that you wrote a piece like this to show people that they can be comfortable with who they are. It was brave of you, and I completely respect that. Well done.

on Mar. 19 2011 at 1:19 am
Laurennnn PLATINUM, Sadieville, Kentucky
31 articles 9 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people merely exist, that is all." -Oscar Wilde

Do it every year! So pumped to do it again this year!