Cold Coffee | Teen Ink

Cold Coffee MAG

May 6, 2015
By TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown


“Whoa, hey, get your own coffee, dude. I need the caffeine just as much as you.”

Gosh, some people are so invasive. I’m not sure my eyes could roll back any further.

I’m sitting alone in a classic, faded red-and-white ’50s-style diner simply because I don’t know what else to do. The same waiter I always see, the one with Asperger’s, just tried to sip my coffee like he does every day. Today, I just don’t feel like that is necessary. I’m worn out, and he can get his own coffee if he wants it so dang badly.

A lot of people think it’s weird how I treat everyone equally. Probably because I treat everyone badly, equally badly. I feel like the world isn’t a place for patience. We all have too much of our own junk to get done, and we don’t need to get in the way of other people and their junk.

Other people think I’m a misanthrope. Fine, I’ll accept that, but it’s simply because nobody lives up to their potential. Like the waiter with Asperger’s. That guy could be a millionaire, but he’s a waiter at a classic, faded red-and-white ’50s-style diner.

Now, I’m not saying that it’s necessarily his fault that he’s stuck serving me and a bunch of other hobos cold coffee. Maybe other people sat on that guy’s self-esteem ’til he felt he couldn’t ever inflate again. That’s the world’s fault then. We need to stop ruining people.

I conclude that people ruin others because they are ruined themselves. What I say is true; I’ve seen it through cracked lenses. There were many long nights of having an abusive father and a mother who couldn’t fight back. My father was a really messed-up kind of guy, and the selfish human nature that encompasses us all just took a special liking to him. He wanted his wife to be on his level, and he wasn’t willing to take the trip up. She had to come down with him.

Forget about my parents, you know. I try to. They’ve been gone long enough that the blood stains on my palms should be clean by now, right? But they’re really not, and as a result, here I sit drinking cold coffee at a classic, faded red-and-white ’50s-style diner.

I’ve been so tired lately. It’s really getting to me, you know. I’m irritated, as well. I’m finding little things bother me that didn’t before. Like the waiter sipping my daily coffee.

Gosh, people are so invasive.

I wish people had reached out to me. I wish they would now.

These are the things I think about when my lips stall shut before the cold coffee can touch my tongue. If I want someone to reach out to me, I have to stick my hand out first. I slowly place the mug on the table and stare at the waiter.

His eyes meet mine, and he pads over, asking for my order, even though I already received my drink.

I do not reply. Instead, I motion him to sit, and with a flick of my wrist I send the sugared-up cold coffee sliding to his side of the table.

The waiter looks at me, his eyes asking for permission like a child. I nod, gesturing toward the mug. He lifts it to his lips and lets the liquid grace his mouth, a few drops slipping down his chin.

He puts the mug on the table and sits up a little bit straighter, looking me in the eye.

“Gosh, people are so inviting,” he whispers. 


The author's comments:

I wrote this off the top of my head. It represents human hate that can be masked by little things, in this case a cup of cold coffee that used to be shared but isn't anymore. I challenge you to write something like this, and post your link in the comments. Thank you guys.

 

Love as always, Taylor.


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This article has 9 comments.


on May. 20 2015 at 12:03 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

Thanks Poet! Good to hear from you again. (:

on May. 17 2015 at 7:03 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

geez, when I saw this, I thought of scrouge from "A christmas carol" XD Gee, misanthropic is tha word for it. But great story, I could hear it and see it :) Great job, keep writing

on May. 17 2015 at 2:19 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

And yes, I'm labeling that character as the "waiter with Asperger's" as reference to any person with special needs. Sorry, I had to re-read the comment to formulate an extra response.

on May. 16 2015 at 2:45 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

TeenInk.com/forums?act=post&topic_id=17&thread_id=86597&rand=0.6056419529693501#reply2046583

on May. 16 2015 at 2:43 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

Thank you for the feedback, Beila. In general, you're right, my writing style is a little vague and "un-researched." However, my point in describing the waiter as "the guy with Asperger's" is to initiate the tone of the narrator. I'm trying to show how the customer views this waiter... However, I don't disagree that I should add more information into the real disease. Thank you again.

on May. 16 2015 at 2:41 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

Hello! Thank you so, so much for this. Sure, I'll make a forum post. (:

on May. 11 2015 at 4:58 pm
CNBono17 SILVER, Rural, South Carolina
5 articles 0 photos 250 comments

Favorite Quote:
Lego ergo sum (Latin—I read, therefore, I am)
The pen is mightier than the sword—unknown
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity—1 Timothy 4:12

Hey, could you start a forum for response pieces? I wrote one, but it's a little too short to post.

Beila BRONZE said...
on May. 10 2015 at 1:26 am
Beila BRONZE, Palo Alto, California
3 articles 0 photos 519 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco." -Mark Twain

I really, really like the unique twist you've put on this piece. The message is truly beautiful and just straight up true. Any one person can initiate an incredible chain of kindness, and it just takes you to be the first. I love the way his own story of abuse reflects his insight into the waiter's story of "deflation." However, since I found this story through a feedback thread on forums, I know you're looking for constructive criticism, too, so here are my two main thoughts on that. One: Why, oh why is his family story SO stereotypical? Clearly, you're a very inventive person, so I think you could have found a much more subtle and eye-catching way to express his history without tossing out the abusive-father-doormat-mother classic. Two: As someone who works with people with special needs, I'm unsure? uncomfortable? of/with what you're saying about Aspergers and people who have it. Why have you included that detail? To me, the way you've described the waiter makes me wonder if you're trying to draw the "average" person with Aspergers to use him as a reference to all people with special needs, or creating a normal character and adding Aspergers as an interesting character detail. If the latter, then I'd say it's kind of unpleasant, to say the least, to just label him in that way because people with Aspergers are just that: PEOPLE... with Aspergers. You keep calling it back to that as if it's his most notable characteristic. Find something else interesting to say about him, like a fascination or hobby or talent. However, if you're intentionally making a statement about treating people with special needs kindly, then I'd encourage you to research more about Aspergers, what it means, and how it affects people's lives so that you can draw a more convincing character. To be honest, the details that you're giving about him now, such as his potential to be a millionaire and his totally socially unacceptable habit of drinking another guy's coffee without permission, as well as the fact that you compare him to a small child in the very end, make me feel like you're drawing off of some limited second-hand knowledge about individuals with special needs to paint what you think that looks like instead of taking the time to genuinely understand. The details you've thrown in make a kind of disjointed character, and I'm unclear of what your intention is in creating him like that. Sorry, that comment got long. :) Again, I really enjoyed this piece; that's just my in-depth analysis of places you could grow.

on May. 9 2015 at 6:32 pm
CNBono17 SILVER, Rural, South Carolina
5 articles 0 photos 250 comments

Favorite Quote:
Lego ergo sum (Latin—I read, therefore, I am)
The pen is mightier than the sword—unknown
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity—1 Timothy 4:12

This is incredible. Really, it made me think long and hard; this comment was written maybe an hour after I first read the story. I love it, and the contrast shown in how different people think and affect one another is really profound. I'll try to take up that challenge. Well done!