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The Last Kiss
Jareds soft lips touch mine. I pull away slowley, and open my eyes. A small smile appers across his face. I giggle. My mother calls me in. I laugh as I run to my house. I turn around, and wave goodbye.
The bright sun rises over the moutain. I go out side to see Jared. His beautiful green eyes met mine. It's as if my heart is doing flips. He lightly kisses me, but nothing like befor. This time it was as if somethig was wrong.
As we walk to the park he seems angry, or sad I can't tell. I ask him whats wrong. He tells me he wants to talk. I try to say okay , but there is a lump in my throught inabling the word from coming out, so I just shake my head.
We get there, and sit on the hard bench wet from last nights rain. A tear falls from his eye,as I wrap him in a hug. He tells me that he is very sick, and isn't going to live much longer. I gasp as he tells me the rest. His voice cracked when he tells me we need ti brake up. I told him we need each other. Then he tells me okay, and I call my mom to pick us up.
A week later he asked me to marrie him. I say yes. We get married right there on his bed.
The day after that he tells me he is about to die right there. so I give A kiss, the last kiss.
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This article has 38 comments.
Some possible improvements to make it better:
1. Spelling and grammar check
2. Dialogue
3. More extensive vocabulary
4. More description; make the reader feel as if they are really in the scene
5. Get rid of overused phrases, 'it's as if my heart is doing flips'
out for those grammmatical errors keep on writing CHECK OUT MY STUFF TOO
keep up the writting
