I can not find my dad any where. I have searched the whole house. He must be in the basement playing darts again. I walked down the creaky stairs and turn my head slightly. He’s nowhere in sight. Think Dakota, think. Where else might he be hiding out? The garage! Bingo. I walk across the hall and open the pastel door that leads to the garage and he was not there either. I have no idea where he could have gone! I checked my room, the laundry room, and my backyard. Still no trace of him. He’s not in the kitchen either. I feel like there is one more place. My parents room! That’s it. I rush up the stairs and turn left to enter their room. I check the bathroom. I fall to the ground and tears rush down my face. I can’t breath. My chest hurts.
He is lying there lifeless. His face is pale. An empty bottle of pills laid next to him that were full at one time. I couldn’t breathe. My legs became weak and i collapsed to the ground. It was one of the moments where you were so shocked you couldn’t cry. I could hear my mom's footsteps coming up the stairs. “Dakota! Lunch is ready! Come and eat sweetie!”
“Mom. I can’t.” He whimpered.

“Dakota come downstairs” His mom said in a fierce voice. Dakota was drowning in tears by now.

“Mom. I can’t! I just can’t!” he sobbed.
          
    “Dakota are you okay?!” She cried as she ran up the stairs. My mom peered into her bedroom to see her husband laying there dead. She could not speak and ran downstairs. All I heard was a blood curdling scream. My stomach hurts. My whole body begins to cramp up. So much anxiety. I lay there. I try to clear my mind but I can’t. All I can think about is my father. All the memories of us rush through my mind. I don’t stop it. I let the memories flow. It makes me smile but depressed because I know he is never coming back.
              *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *

The sun shines through my blinds and awakens me. I don’t want to get up. My mom called me down for breakfast two times but I just cannot get myself to physically get out of bed. I hear my mom's footsteps again.
“Hey sweetie, I called you in sick cause I figured you weren’t feeling so well. I'm sorry about yesterday.. It's just us two now…” she starts sobbing and hugs me tightly. She stands up and leaves my room. She can’t sleep in her own bed now; It smells like my father too much.
My mom cries every single time someone says, “Hey where's Dan? I haven’t seen him around lately.” That’s how people found out. It went around town.  
I missed a week of school already. My mom said I had to go back today. Ugh, there it is, Easton Ridge High School, home of the cougars. I can’t find my friends. The bell rings, time to head in. I walk up to my ugly dark purple locker, enter the combo, 23-09-42. I put my backpack away  and bring my binder and coffee cup with me to first period. I’m walking down the hall when I see a new face.
I can’t take my eyes off her. She has dirty blonde hair that flows with the breeze in the hallway. She notices me looking at her at smiles. I smile back and accidentally bump into someone and fall. She giggles and leaves. I am so embarrassed right now. I can’t stop thinking about her. I hope she is in one of my classes. She is beautiful.   
    **************************
I have math now with Ms.Herrscher. She has a very colorful classroom; the walls are neon pink and green. She is the youngest teacher in our school, 23 to be exact. I walk in and sit in my desk next to my best friend Dallas Von. He is the most popular guy in school. I’m in the popular group. I see someone walk in and suddenly my heart jumps.
As she enters the room her flowy skirt flows in the breeze and so does her hair. Its Cassie. She hands the teacher a pass and walk toward me. There’s an empty seat next to me. I really hope she sits next to me.
“Is this seat taken?” she said smiling.

“No”, I smile. She sits down and I get butterflies in my stomach.

“Her room is pretty interesting, huh?”

“Yeah I really like it.”

“Hey, do you have Mr. Kannif?”

“ Yeah, why?”

“ Well we have a project and I was wondering if you wanted to work on it with me because you’re like the only person that has been really nice to me today”

“Okay, I would love to”

“Alright awesome, here’s my phone number and maybe we can plan a day to work on it” She says as she smiles and hands me a paper with her number written in cursive. 

“ Okay. I’ll text you tonight”, I smile.

“Awesome”, she says as she smiles and finishes her notes on equations.

    *******************************************

 
I saw her walking home the other day. Turns out she lives in my neighborhood. She lives in a bright yellow house with white shutters. She has a white fence surrounding her house. Cassie also has a dog named Karina and she is a grey husky. I am thinking about asking her if she wants to walk to school with me sometime. She seems really nice. I think I like her.
As soon as I get home I go straight to my room and take a nap. My phone rings. Ugh, what now. Its Cassie. She texted me asking if she could come over for a little bit to work on the project. I’m really tired but I guess I’ll help her with the project.  I texted her back saying yes and that she can come at 5:30. I have to clean my room really quick. It's not that messy, I just have clothes on my floor. * Door bell rings*. Oh no she’s here. I rush down the stairs and open the door. She looks amazing. She has her long, blonde hair curled and she is wearing blue jean shorts and a black and white flower crop top.
“Hey! Are you ready to work on this?”

“ Yeah, let's go to my room because my mom is busy doing her P90X videos down here.” We walk up the stairs and turn right down the hall to go to my room.

“ You have a very nice room”

“ Thanks. We can sit on the floor or my bed, it doesn’t matter.”

“ Okay let’s sit on the floor”

“Alright. I’ll get my laptop”

“ Haha okay”

We are going to do our project on the history of cake. I know it is lame but I think it will be cool. We are doing a video. I can edit it with my macbook. Cassie wants to include the song Birthday Cake by Rihanna. She told me she had to leave for dinner. I walked her downstairs to the door.
“This was fun.”

“Yeah it was. Same time tomorrow?” I ask nervously.

“Yes, I will text you.” She hugs me and waves goodbye as she walks out the door.

This has been a great day. I am really starting to like Cassie. She is just so beautiful. I can not stop thinking about her and the way she hugged me.

    *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *

Cassie came over again today and we didn’t do too much work because we were busy watching funny youtube videos. We had so much fun today. When she left she told me we should work at her house tomorrow. I agreed to walk over there at 4:35. She changed her clothes from what she was wearing at school today. Now she had on a tiffany blue strapless dress that was kind of tight. It's a gorgeous dress in my opinion. We walk upstairs to her bedroom and she tells me that her parents are not home so I have to meet them the next time I come over. We enter her bedroom and it is the same color as her dress and her bedding is white. She has white christmas lights hung all around her room and white  furniture.

“You have a great bedroom”

“Thanks, I redid it this summer”

“Oh, well it’s amazing”,We sit down on her bed and she gets her laptop.

“We have been spending a lot of time together” she says as she picks at a loose string on her bedding.

“Yeah”

“ I like you”

“Oh.”

“Yeah”

“I have had a crush on you for a long time”

“Really?”

“Yep”

“Do you maybe want to, you know, date?”

“Yes.” My palms are getting sweaty. Is this really happening?

“ Okay”

I don’t know what else to say. We are both quiet. I am looking down at the carpet when she leans over and kisses me. At first I pull myself away and she sits back and looks away. I lean forward and gently put me lips on hers. She kisses me passionately. I pull her closer to me. Butterflies flutter inside me. I have never felt this way before.
     *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *

People quickly noticed us at school as a couple. She quickly got in with the popular girls because I am popular. She really helped me forget about losing my dad and I am not that depressed anymore. I am starting to fall in love with Cassie. She is just a beautiful person inside and out. I am so glad I met her.
As soon as I get home my mom calls my name.
“I need to talk to you”

“Yeah mom?”

“I don’t really like your girlfriend, she is going to break your heart.”

“Mom. You don’t know Cassie like I do”

“She is just dating you because you are popular and now that she is popular she is going to breakup with you”

“ No! You’re wrong! She told me she loves me and she means it!”, I yell.

“Whatever. I’m right, just watch”

“Mom, just stop”

“She can’t come over anymore”

“Mom! You don’t decide who can come over and who can’t!”

“Yes I can, I am your mother and I pay for this house”

“Ugh! Whatever!”, I yell and run upstairs to my bedroom. I can’t stop crying. It's 8:30 pm. My stomach grumbles. I cannot get out of bed. She can’t do this to me. Cassie is perfect. She couldn’t do anything wrong. I’m drowning in tears.
  I wake up to the buzzing of my alarm clock. I check the time, it is 6:35. I have 30 more minutes until I have to be ready for school. One text message from Cassie. It says “Good morning baby, how are you today?”. I don’t respond. I don’t know how I am going to tell her. I don’t know what to say about my mom. For now I just close my eyes and breathe.

     * * * * *

             I had the guts to tell her. She doesn’t know what to say or think. We talked on the phone and she was quiet and told me she loves me and hung up. I feel bad already. I know she is upset. Everything is embarrassing. I cannot believe my mom said that. I’m not sad about it anymore, I’m just really mad at my mom. She doesn’t know Cassie like I do. Ever since she told me that, we don’t really talk anymore. After my father's death, we have been growing farther and farther apart. It is quite sad actually. We use to be so close. Now we aren’t.
I pick up my phone and send a text to Cassie. I tell her how she is my everything and how much I love her. She texts me back. But I didn’t enjoy it too much.
“Dakota, I know your mom doesn’t like me too much
and that is fine. We keep fighting about it though.
We fight about other things too.
I really hate arguing with you but what can you do.
I’m sorry. I really am. I think we need a break.
I can’t have this right now, I need to focus on school.
I love you.”

I don’t know what to do. I can’t breathe.

* * *  * *  * *

We haven’t been talking at school. I know she is sad about taking a break, but we need this. I walk home alone for the next week. I can’t wait till’ we’re done with this whole break thing. My mom is watching the news. I over hear something that scares me a little.
There is a missing girl my age and she has blonde hair and blue eyes. Cassie ran through my mind. They said the media cannot release the girls name yet. I call her as soon as i hear that. No answer. I try again. Still no answer. I start to worry. What if it is her? What if she is killed? Raped? I don’t know how I will live with myself if it is her. I try calling her again. Still no answer. I really begin to worry.
I hope to see her at school the next day. She is not in math or science. After school I walk home and turn on the news. They have released the name. No. This cannot happen to me.
I have no words. Tears rush down my face. My mom rushes upstairs.

“Honey, I’m so sorry”

“Mom! Just stop! Get out of my room!”, something snapped in me. I have never yelled at my mom like that before. I don’t want to go to school.
I lay in bed all day the next day thinking about Cassie. A few weeks pass. Nothing. She isn't found. I stopped crying about it. I know she is gone and I am going to have to live with that. I turn on the news that afternoon and I heard something that has changed my life forever.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

  The had found her body. I can’t cry. I’m too hurt inside. I have to let this moment go. I have to move on with just like I did with my father. What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger.