I’m sorry.

I’m sorry for being stubborn at your birthday party. You said I had to change into the party clothes but I never did. I couldn’t bring myself to. All I could do was stare into your dimming eyes, which sunk as I kept my ear to ear grin plastered on my face. You huffed and stormed out of your room, running downstairs to greet the visitors. I’m sorry for that.

I’m sorry for not cooperating with the other friends. I know you love performing. And I genuinely love watching you prance around your stage. You sing your favorite songs, hitting each note with precision in time and key. And your dancing keeps the show going, as you jump with your arms outstretched, doing magnificent twirls and prances across the stage. But I had to say I didn’t like it. I had to be booed by your friends. But I had to keep my smile. I’m sorry for that.

I’m sorry for traveling with you. I was the last to be picked to leave, but it’s not like you agreed. Your overseer picked me for you, making me do an extravagant dance to persuade you. You reluctantly agreed, grabbing me by the limbs and taking me. You were already upset, and I saw that. I was reminded every day by everyone else. But I kept my smile. I’m sorry for that.

And on the boat, I’m sorry for letting go as you swung me around. It was a good time. You were feeling better about my past mistakes. But I let go of your hands, swinging off…hitting the water. I kept a smile. I’m sorry.

And I’m sorry for sinking. I heard you scream out for me, and I could have screamed out to you as well. But I sank so fast. I kept that damn smile. I’m sorry.

And I’m sorry. Because here I am covered in this mucky green stuff and sand and dirt. All I see is darkness of the water. But I stare back up, waiting for you to return. But it’s obvious you won’t. You were mad at me still, I could tell. I’m afraid I’m not smiling anymore. I’m sorry.

I’m sorry.