"Hey, I'm-" My words immediately halted as I turned into my bedroom and witnessed my nightmare unfold. Too shocked to even form sentences in my head, I just stared. Their figures came in and out of my field of vision, her fastening her bra and rushing out of the room, him nonchalantly looking for his pants that were lost in the pile of clothes. Their clothes. Holding back my tears, I looked up at him, and though it was the back of his head, I could tell what his expression was like just by the long annoyed sigh he let out.  My vision got cloudier, but it was too late. I had seen, and the damage had been done. This couldn't be happening.
        "This, this is a joke right?" My chuckle turned into howls which grew louder and louder, almost as if I was trying to laugh the pain away, but begged on the inside that he would say something, or to tell me this was all just a joke, a dream. A minute passed and all I got was a ringing silence that seemed to hold more truths than he ever did. This hadn't been the first time, and it surely wouldn't be the last. Each passing minute felt like more daggers were being struck into me. I couldn't breathe. I didn't want to. Nerves tensing up and fists clasped tightly, I wound up my arm as far back as it would go, tears dripping all over my cheeks and the floor, and I stood frozen for a couple seconds. His face of remorse transitioned into an expression of shock in a split second, yet time stood still, showing me each outline and wrinkle of his face as he got ready for the impact of my knuckles against his cheek. A feeling of guilt started brewing deep within in my chest as my arm made it's way down, but vanished after discovering the glossy stain of her lips on the side of his neck. I swung harder. Upon contact, not only did I feel my fist slamming into his bone, I heard the atrocious smack against his skin, and boy did that feel great.
       His head reeled back with my force and his body slammed down onto the hardwood floor with a satisfying thud. All five years worth of betrayed love, broken promises, and shattered trust went into that swing, and it did me some justice. The sight of his skin rippling out and back into place, the bobbing of his skull, and the flailing of his arms all seemed surreal.
      For minutes he just laid there, sprawled out on the floor, unconscious. His body twitched as if it were trying to fight the shock it had just endured but his eyes remained closed, and cheek began to swell. During those minutes, I dashed into my closet, gathered every article of clothing I owned, shoved them into a duffel bag and ran out. Fresh hot tears kept streaming out of my eyes and down my cheeks keeping them warm from the biting cold, and I made my way to the car. The engine roared to life and as hard as I tried to sort out my thoughts, they refused. Listening to the low hum and feeling the soft vibrations, I was suddenly sapped of all my energy and as my nerves loosened, all the emotions that were tightly bounded came pouring out onto the blurry steering wheel. My gasps were loud and suffocating as I desperately tried to swallow air into my lungs.
      Inside, I felt the mess he had left. Starting from the first few dates we had together to the never ending smiles that were glued to our faces as we exchanged our vows. He had ripped out my memories, shredded the pictures pinned into the walls of my heart, and sliced through my emotions. With my mind too exhausted to even think, my arm automatically stretched out to the glove compartment, knuckles stained with a purplish red hue. Ignoring the throbbing pain shooting up my nerves, I opened the compartment and clasped my hand tightly around the all too familiar plastic handle. Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and let it out in staggering breaths as I tried to calm my body down. Eyes still closed, I lifted it out and quickly brought it up to my wrist. Putting pressure on the blade, I slid it across feeling the slight tingle, and the warm liquid oozing out of me. Starting from the fresh open wound, it made its way down my palm and quickly spread down my fingers. Dangling my arm from my side, I felt as it dripped down onto the floor. My leaking tears got mixed into the blood, and not knowing which was which anymore, I let myself drip and melt into  the river of pain and relief. My body was slowly getting engulfed by the cold and numbness and I didn't move a muscle. Tilting my thousand pound head, I watched as my life slowly dripped out of me. My muscles relaxed a bit more, and my nerves no longer fought the cold, embracing it instead. My eyes surrendered to the calmness that had washed over me. Through the darkened slits, I witnessed my golden ring fall off, giving a final twinkle as it fell. Floating down and hitting the car floor, it bounced lightly, effortlessly. Almost like he did.