It was Miranda’s first day at Writopia on June 23rd, 2014. She was very excited to be spending a week there. The kids in her class were Jules, Leticia, Addie, Ruby, Lily Davis, another girl named Lily who had red hair, Noah who was the only boy, Yana, and Georgia. Their teacher was Courtney. They were all talking that day when Lily Davis started talking about her horrible experience at Soul Cycle.
She said, “One day, my mom took me to Soul Cycle as, like, a mother-daughter exercise, and it was terrible. This lady yelled at us to pedal faster the whole time and she was so scary!” She also mentioned that she would have to go again this weekend. She told Courtney that she would write a personal essay about Soul Cycle. During lunch, when Lily Davis and Ruby left because they both do half days, Miranda had the ultimate plan to surprise Lily and save her from her turmoil.
She stood up in the middle of the lawn and yelled, “Teens of Write4pia! Gather round!” At first the teens were confused but then they gathered around Miranda, who explained her plan to the group. She requested that they all give her their phone numbers, which she wrote down on a piece of paper.
Miranda was about to tell the group that they could go eat their lunches now when Noah said, “Wait, Miranda, do you have a violin or a chain saw at home?”
Miranda said, “No I don’t have a chain saw, but I do have a violin, I’ve been playing it for 7 years.”
Noah said, “Good. Bring the violin when we save Lily from Soul Cycle. It’s a great weapon because the strings can be used to tie knots. I’ll bring my chain saw.”

That evening, Miranda got a call from Leticia.
Her mom didn’t recognize the name on the Caller ID, but Miranda explained, “It’s a friend from Writopia. I recognize the last name. Long story, I’ll tell you later.” As soon as she finished speaking, she picked up the phone.
Leticia said, “Hi Miranda, I forgot to tell you, my aunt has a very vicious cat. She attacks everyone except my aunt. Can I bring her to Soul Cycle?”
Miranda, excited to have another weapon, answered, “Yeah, please bring your cat! I can’t wait to see the look on the Soul Cycle lady’s face when she gets scratched!”
Leticia laughed and said, “I know right! Bye, I’m gonna go read Maze Runner, see you tomorrow.”
Miranda said, “Bye!” and hung up. This weekend was gonna be a blast!

That weekend, Miranda was ready. She told her mom that her Writopia group was gonna go to Soul Cycle together, but she didn’t explain what they would do there. At 10:00 AM, the doorbell rang. She saw the whole crew: Jules, Noah, Addie, Leticia with her cat in a carrier, Georgia, Ruby, Yana, and red-haired Lily.
Georgia said, “The other Lily’s already at Soul Cycle, and Noah’s chain saw’s downstairs in the lobby.” That’s when Miranda realized she forgot her violin. She rushed back to her room, got it, and ran back to the door.
Miranda’s mom asked, “Why are you bringing your violin?” Miranda had planned for this situation.
She said, “I wanna show my friends my skills after we exercise.” Her Writopia group nodded in agreement.
“Well...ok,” her mom said, still a little confused. She didn’t, however, question anybody’s outfit because they were all wearing exercise clothes. They had to wear something they could move around in so they could attack an evil Soul Cycle lady after all.

By the time the group got to Soul Cycle, they couldn’t believe their eyes or ears. A bunch of people, mostly women, were sweating buckets, peadaling faster on stationary bikes than Noah thought was scientifically possible according to the laws of physics, and they were panting as though they were dying. Even Lily Davis’ mom was having a hard time. But the person who was suffering the most was Lily Davis, the only kid in the room.
Every time someone slowed down, an ugly woman at the head of the riders, who had her hair in a greasy ponytail, yelled, “MOVE FASTER, YOU WORTHLESS HOOLIGANS!” Then she would growl and bare her pointy fangs. The Writopia group was shivering so much that they were afraid their plan wouldn’t work. Suddenly Miranda remembered what to do. She whispered what to do to Noah, Addie, and Georgia. Noah rushed over to the evil woman and threw her off the bike. Addie and Georgia wrapped their long hair around her neck in an effort to strangle her. At last she was unable to give the riders any commands. Lily realized what her friends were doing for her and jumped off her bike with the most grateful expression on her face she’d ever made. Soon the other riders followed suit and jumped off their bikes, including Lily’s mom. As Noah was doing karate on the evil woman, he tried to tell the riders to stretch or else their legs would get sore, but they were too happy to care.

In a little while, the evil woman released the hair from her neck. She was intensely strong.
She demanded, “What is going on here!?” Leticia politely explained the plan to her in Portugese.
The evil woman yelled in her face, “Not. In. SPANISH YOU MORON!” Leticia had a proud little smile on her face. She was used to people mistaking Portugese for Spanish. Then Yana walked up to the evil woman and explained the plan to her in Creole.
The evil woman yelled, “I. Only. Speak. ENGLISH!!!!” Leticia and Yana, who realized they had not spoken since they entered the room politely said, “No speak English.” It wasn’t true, they knew, but they were glad to be able to lie about it.
“Ok, children,” said the evil woman in the most polite voice she had to offer, “I would like to know what is going on here.”
Ruby said, “Why should you know right now?”
Jules said, “Yeah, show us a little fucking patience.”
Noah said, “A great person once said: ‘I never think about the future. It comes soon enough.’”
The evil woman said, “Ok, I’ll wait. In the meantime, Lily, I need to talk to you.” Red-haired Lily asked, “Ok, what do you need?”
The evil woman said, “Not you, the other Lily.”
But she had hardly finished speaking when red-haired Lily said, “Oh, I
know what you need.” Then she ripped the strings off Miranda’s violin. She tied the evil woman’s hands and feet together. Both hands were tied to both feet. Georgia and Addie wrapped their hair around the evil woman’s neck once again. Noah chain sawed her head off. No one called the police. Everybody clapped.

Suddenly, Lily Davis’ mom hugged her daughter.
“Oh, Lily,” she said, “Thank you for saving me from that horrible person. You’re the best daughter in the world.”
Lily blushed, smiled, and said, “Mom, please, I did nothing. Miranda told me she planned it all.”
Miranda said, “Oh no, I couldn’t have done it without Noah’s karate.”
Noah said,“Well I couldn’t have done it without Addie and Georgia’s long hair.”
Georgia said, “Well we couldn’t have done it without red-haired Lily ripping the strings off Miranda’s violin.”
Red-haired Lily said, “Well I couldn’t have done it without Leticia’s Portugese.”
Leticia said, “Well I couldn’t have done it without Yana’s Creole.”
Yana said, “Well I couldn’t have done it if Ruby didn’t ask the evil woman to be patient.”
Ruby said, “Well I couldn’t have done it without Jules’ sassy swearing.”
Jules said, “Well I couldn’t have done it without any of you girls. Go feminism!”
Noah said, “Aw, Jules, I’m so honored.”
Jules corrected herself, “Oh, you too Noah. You were great.”
Noah said, “That’s more like it.”
One of the former Soul Cycle riders said, “Guys, you have truly made my day. No, you made my life. I’m gonna cancel my membership right now. Who’s with me?” Everyone said, “Here,” or “Me” or something like that.
The riders went inside to cancel their memberships and Miranda walked her friends back home. On the way, she called Courtney on her cell phone. She told the whole story, including the part about how Noah murdered the evil woman.
Miranda asked, “Do you mind that Noah committed murder?”
Courtney said, “Of course not, do you know how many people I’ve killed in my books? Remember, there are no rules at Writopia.”
Then Miranda called Danielle, Yael, and the rest of the Writopia staff and interns to tell them her story. She told her mom about it too, including the murder part, and her mom promised to buy her a new violin as a present.
She said, “Miranda, you have displayed just the amount of judgment nessecary to get a smartphone. I’m gonna get you one in addition to a new violin. I’m gonna call Danielle from Writopia and tell her what an awesome daughter you are.”
Then Miranda went home, hugged all her Writopia friends goodbye, and they all went home and wrote poems about their experience.