The Chcolate Promise | Teen Ink

The Chcolate Promise

March 18, 2011
By firestarmy GOLD, Irvine, California
firestarmy GOLD, Irvine, California
12 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is like a highway.
Life is like the weather.
Speak now before it's too late ~Taylor Swift <3
It doesn't rain forever ;D

July August September October November

When I saw all the chocolates on the table, I was stunned. Mouth agape and eyes bulging, I whipped around sharply to face the bulky physique of my older brother. The grease on his face was shining, practically screaming that his face was extremely oily and his pudgy fingers were clearly stained with the luscious brown snack he was devouring. The remains of the food wrappings were littered on the colossal coffee table and behind it, his huge figure lounged on the red sofa, which had tinges of brown smeared on the red fabric and on the white t-shirt that he had thrown on this morning to leave for work. The seams of his t-shirt were bearing all the excess weight of his body and were on the brink of threatening to release their once firm grip on the cloth which they held together successfully for years until my brother had showed no regard for his worsening health.

“Jason!” I screamed at the sight of my brother, “You promised!” My brother, Jason, upon hearing his name being called, turned his attention from the television to me lazily. Staring innocently at me, he put on a puzzled face and questioned me quizzically.

Trust is like Paper

“What promise?” He replied wearily while licking his lips satisfactorily after swallowing a bar of chocolate. Firstly, anger swept through my body and surrounded me like a foul stench at the sight of the fatty snacks and now, his response fuelled my fury even more and almost turned me into a volcano on the verge of an enormous explosion. My instincts roared for me to resort to drastic measures and I willingly adhered. I lifted my hand and curled it into a ball. With teeth clenched, I prepared to unleash my strongest punch at the couch potato on the sofa. However, while staring into his eyes, my brother’s face displayed taunting looks which goaded me to strike and at the same time pitiful ones, pleading me to calm down. I felt a mixture of emotions all at once and could not take it anymore. I slammed my fist onto the table, swiping all the wrappers off it instead of ending it into Jason’s beefy cheeks. With that, I turned tail and ran as fast as my legs could carry me out of the house and headed for a safe place. Some kind of haven for me to break down. I foundd it in the Café which I often ate in. There I finally let those angry and hot tears stream down my pale and sallow face. A flurry of thoughts whizzed through my mind but the most prominent one was: ‘How did the promise came about?’ Then, a series of events flashed vividly in my mind, reminding me of the incident that caused me to place my entire trust on this person, Jason……

Childhood Innocence

When I was young, my brother was often not around and I did not know why. My parents also refused to answer my queries about this issue and always chose to change the subject. They also act like as if he was never even related to us and had a strict rule that I was forbidden to go outside on my own. Thus, I formed my own conclusion that he was in a University overseas and my parents missed him too much so they preferred me not uttering a single word about him. They kept me protected outside so as to alleviate their worries about losing another child to care for. However, I was indeed wrong. I just realized this when I was in the first year of high school on a school field trip around the botanical gardens. I was lured to an isolated and the most beautiful part of the park.


While admiring the fresh roses in the thick shrubbery, a thundering shout pierced the tranquility of the surroundings. It piqued my curiosity and I started to search for the source of sound. It was amid some bushes and to my horror as I peeked through, a burly man was throwing punches mercilessly at an obese one who was trying his best to dodge the attacks. Looking closer at the overweight man, it struck me that he looked almost like my big brother, Jason! Could it be? I questioned with hard wonder. I had believed that he was gone forever, on the point of no return but there he was, just under my nose.

All this while, I was staring peculiarly at this stranger that I had almost forgotten to seek help for him since he was being brutalized badly by the other man who looked like he could snap all my bones apart within seconds. I rose from my spot ready to send aid to my brother look-alike by calling my teacher over to handle the situation but it was too late, the psychopath managed to hit home and his rotund body tumbled into the bushes that concealed me from view. Unfortunately, his elbow knocked my head into a thorn in the greenery and an acute pain shot through my head. Thick, fresh blood gushed down my temple and the excruciating pain was more than unbearable. With the little strength I had, I pulled the top of my head away from the sharp splint. I did not know what happened after that, I had slipped into the dark atmosphere of unconsciousness.

The Promise

When I came to, the three people who were visible to me were my parents and my brother. I smiled. This was the first time we were ever together. Then, when I heard them hurling abuse at each other, my heart skipped a beat. I did not want my family to be broken apart again ever. My fear quickly turned to anger and I screamed at them to go away, to banish from my sight. They rushed to me, advising me to relax as I had not fully recovered from the wound sustained on my forehead. Then, I replied that only a promise, would make me carry on with my life, which was for my parents to accept my brother for who he was no matter how much he dishonoured them and for my brother in turn, to turn away from his old life and to turn over a new leaf like not committing crimes which landed him in the cold prison for years and improving his health so that he could live longer and to make up for lost time……

First Broken then Fixed Tears

However, he did not take it seriously now. I dissolved into another puddle of tears after the recount of the events leading to this day. I still could not believe that he could let my parents and I especially down like this.

“Fancy a tissue?” A warm and familiar voice interrupted my thoughts. I looked up to find Jason standing there apologetically. Was it another trap? I mused. I did not want to trust him again but what he said softened my heart of stone and from that day on our relationship strengthened and I began to build my trust in him, a changed man. This was what he said with conviction and it moved me to tears again:

“I’m really sorry, Anna, for I know that I have let you down again. I knew you made this promise for the best of our interests and not for you alone. I have really thought through about what you said and now I know and understood fully the horrible beast I have morphed into. I am really grateful for you have not given up on me despite you knowing that I am notorious for committing many inhumane crimes. You are very different, you gave me second chances when nobody else would and I beg for another second chance. However, if you don’t give it to me, I will understand. Though I really hope you would, I sincerely ask this from the depths of my heart and I wish you would see my sincerity too. Lastly, I want to say I’m sorry again, though I know no amount of sorry would heal the wound in your heart but I want to prove myself, that I deserve to be trusted again and I would definitely try my very best to never let you down ever again but I cannot do that without your help. I just hope you will give me that precious second chance please.”

The author's comments:
It was an assignment for Language Arts class. the question is 'When i saw all the chocolates on the table, i was stunned...' After i was done with the story, i came up with the title 'The Chocolate Promise' since it gave emphasis on the question but now as i think of it, the chocolate does represent the main idea of the story and the concept of trust! I figured this out in History class, chocolate is sensitive to water and varied temperatures so if water gets into the chocolate while you boil it or the wrong temperature is used to boil the chocolate, the quality of the chocolate drops significantly. Chocolate is like trust. Trust is sensitive to the varying situations that happen in life whether it is hot or cold and if the trust is exposed to the tears shed (which is in contrast to the water). And it is based on the what is happening that the quality of trust between individuals improve or worsens. The boiling of the chocolate can be compared to trust being tested by the challenges of life. i am satisfied that i am able to make the title convey the message of the story effectively.

Similar Articles


This article has 0 comments.