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Daddy's Womb MAG
April 23, 2008
i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.
So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.
i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.
The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.
i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.
i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.
© Anonymous
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This article has 2181 comments.
Arian3807 said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 8:24 pm
wow!!!
i love it
its amazing
i love it
its amazing
Lonesoldier GOLD said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 8:17 pm
that was a really good poem!!!!!
fiveinside2 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 7:59 pm
This is really good! I especially like the ending :) i like how not everything is not understood at once, kind of like the way it is when you're a kid. :D
Prosaic-Scriptor BRONZE said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 6:16 pm
Only thing that turned me off was the "gazed at the birdie." The tone really threw me for a loop...
MorrighanPoe SILVER said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 4:12 pm
One of the reasons I like it is that the format reminds me of my own poetry. if you'd like to check my work out, it's posted on TeenInk.
MorrighanPoe SILVER said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 4:11 pm
To be quite honest, not sure what it's about, but sometimes it's better that way. Great work, love the rhyme and rhythm!
Love~the~LORD<3 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 1:37 pm
Same here my friend
ColorsofChaos13 SILVER said...
on Jan. 27 2010 at 6:18 pm
Wow, that's so intense, i love it for all it's darkness.
Sissybug2012 PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 25 2010 at 7:03 pm
wuts wrong with it? its so creepy that its good.....
aquamarinalin said...
on Jan. 25 2010 at 9:16 am
I really like this poem, it reminds me of when I was a kid.
Unknown said...
on Jan. 24 2010 at 6:41 pm
Amazing! Very well done!
Sissybug2012 PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 24 2010 at 6:20 pm
OH MY GOSH THIS IS MY FAVE OF ALL TIME!! VERY GOOD VERY GOOD!
5 articles 0 photos 5 comments
Favorite Quote:
My favortie quote is------- "Hey whats up" and also "facil" which means easy in spanish