the day i swallowed the sun

May 26, 2018
By saltyranchers SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
saltyranchers SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
7 articles 0 photos 7 comments

the day i finally caught the sun
between my lips
was the day i was set free
from the iron cage
with its iron bars,
that crushed my arms
and shattered my lungs.
i closed my eyes
and let the golden flames
drip down the back of my throat
and coat my tongue like honey.
i felt it spread through
my chest,
felt the thing i
had been chasing
for years
and years
and years.
i watched as the inky blackness
that had suffocated me
for so many silent nights
bled from my fingertips and
sunk into the dirt,
staining the daisies
and wilting the poppies.
a golden bead
slipped
down my cheek,
and i wondered
why my tears
had never tasted so
sweet.
sitting down with the sunflowers,
i watched the cotton candy
clouds
float across the baby blue sky,
and began writing about
the day i swallowed the sun.



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This article has 23 comments.


deanib BRONZE said...
on Sep. 18 at 7:54 pm
deanib BRONZE, Valle Vista, California
3 articles 0 photos 2 comments
I really enjoyed your description of how the sun felt in your chest and how it coated your tongue. However, I would say that the ending doesn't really fell resolved.

rockstar_KK said...
on Sep. 12 at 10:50 am
rockstar_KK, Farmington, New Mexico
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
Very descriptive. Well done.

on Sep. 8 at 8:08 pm
ramblingwriter_7 SILVER, Dublin, Ohio
9 articles 3 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I've realized now that our world doesn't define us, we define our world."

Beautiful! Great job.

on Aug. 25 at 2:29 pm
natalie_reed13 GOLD, Blair, Nebraska
13 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
If you want to win, you have to first believe that you can.

@astork1322

on Aug. 24 at 10:12 am
littlesun BRONZE, Plymouth, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
You're a hairy, wizard

this is soo beautiful omg

on Aug. 18 at 2:53 am
Clary_Fray DIAMOND, Castro Valley, California
50 articles 13 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of the mind
-rwe

I like this a lot

on Aug. 10 at 5:31 am
TeaOnPluto PLATINUM, Dublin, Other
22 articles 0 photos 1 comment
You have talent, this is really beautiful.

on Jul. 28 at 5:12 am
Meghali Bari BRONZE, Indore, Other
1 article 0 photos 12 comments
This poem is really wonderful .

on Jul. 25 at 3:39 pm
Summer_R_Quinn PLATINUM, Sioux Falls, South Dakota
28 articles 0 photos 168 comments

Favorite Quote:
If you chase two rabbits, you will lose them both.
- Native American proverb

Do not go gentle into that good night but rage, rage against the dying of the light.
- Dylan Thomas

This poem is so beautiful I'm speechless. I love the style, keep up the good work!

on Jul. 21 at 6:39 pm
Notte_Stellata SILVER, San Jose, California
8 articles 3 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you cannot do it, practice until you can do it. If you can do it, then practice till you can do it perfectly. If you can do it perfectly, then practice until you can do it perfectly every time."
- Yuzuru Hanyu

It's beautiful, and I don't know... I think the word that represents it the best is 'Freedom'. Incredible Poem. Keep writing!

on Jun. 27 at 3:47 pm
EyesofIris SILVER, South Burlington, Vermont
7 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I've always loved the idea of not being what people expect me to be." -Anonymous

I love this poem, thank you for sharing!

on Jun. 22 at 9:36 pm
Bronwyn-Sophronia-Atlet ELITE, Dardenne Prairie, Missouri
322 articles 10 photos 1162 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To these the past hath its phantoms,
More real than solid earth;
And to these death does not mean decay,
But only another birth"
- Isabella Banks

P.S.: I submitted a feedback post for you, and really hope your piece gets published!! Gah! I love it so much!!!!

on Jun. 22 at 9:23 pm
Bronwyn-Sophronia-Atlet ELITE, Dardenne Prairie, Missouri
322 articles 10 photos 1162 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To these the past hath its phantoms,
More real than solid earth;
And to these death does not mean decay,
But only another birth"
- Isabella Banks

This gave me the chills! So powerful, raw, and touching. I can feel the tone of the poem, a soft, ephemeral heart beat, seeping through my computer screen. This is an amazing piece, and I encourage you to continue writing enthralling poetry such as this!

karisuna GOLD said...
on Jun. 22 at 3:16 am
karisuna GOLD, Pinellas Park, Florida
14 articles 0 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of them all." -The Emperor, Mulan

"Let go of anger, let go of pride, when you are bound by nothing, you go beyond sorrow." -Buddha

The words flow so well. You’re an amazing writer!

on Jun. 11 at 8:25 pm
LoveIsAllYouNeed BRONZE, Flemington, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter. And those who matter don't mind." -Dr Seuss

Beautiful writing style;) This is a great piece

on Jun. 11 at 8:25 pm
LoveIsAllYouNeed BRONZE, Flemington, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter. And those who matter don't mind." -Dr Seuss

Beautiful writing style;) This is a great piece

on Jun. 7 at 12:16 am
ElisaTheDuck ELITE, Rigaud, Other
323 articles 5 photos 168 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Describe yourself in three words."
"Lazy."

Ah such literal release. Been a while since I last read a poem this beautiful and bare and free. Thank you for that. :)

on Jun. 5 at 12:20 pm
Herine-The-Cat BRONZE, Waco, Texas
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You can not change the past, but I daresay, you may learn something from it." ~Time

Congrats, you made me smile.

on Jun. 2 at 5:44 pm
NotAikuChalmers,
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
Thank you Sally! Very cool!!

on Jun. 2 at 1:14 pm
saltyranchers SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
7 articles 0 photos 7 comments
ugh i love u tHANK UUU




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