I laugh,
Light and airy,
When asked why I believe in soulmates.
"It's stupid." I always reply,
Like I'm stuck on autopilot.
Because really,
Who is stupid enough to believe in them?
I've never witnessed a truly happy couple,
My parents are great examples.
But when I lay awake at night,
There's nothing I long for more,
Than a person who's made for me, and I them,
To bring me close
And encompass my heart in warmth.
It's foolish, I know,
I've been told 100 times and told myself 100 more.
Because I really love this boy.
Anytime I see him, I smile, absolutely no exception.
He got me through rough breakups, fights with friends and family, nights I just lost hope in myself.
He takes no credit for it.
He's selfless.
Hardworking.
Happy.
His laughs could actually light a room up if he tried and his humor matches mine perfectly.
He makes me want to change my mind on things I've been stuck on,
Such as my future job, or even kids.
When I imagine my soulmate,
His face is the first to pop into my mind.
And reading this without context, you must think I'm crazy for not making a move on him, for not asking him on a date.
That, or you know exactly what I'm talking about.
Because I'm not the first or only girl to love this boy.
There's at least 1 million more out there,
Feeling exactly how I feel at this moment.
It's a constant battle between my thoughts of,
"You're soulmates, things will work themselves out in the end"
And
"You're not good enough for him."
Because I'm not.
I'm not.
There's so many girls,
Boys,
Who would be better suited.
Prettier,
More talented,
Kinder,
Funnier,
It isn't fair.
I thought we were made for each other?
None of this makes sense anymore.
I want you more than words can describe,
But I'll never be able to have you.
Even if we are soulmates,
We'll never know for sure.
No one does.
And I'm not good enough.
I want you.
I'm selfish.
You're selfless.
Don't we balance each other out nicely?
Like we were made for each other.
Like soulmates.
I'll never stop loving you.