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A Tuesday is just another Tuesday
It is the The day we are let out early to explore the world we are so shielded from.
The world I was so shielded from
You were a lion and I was a tourist who couldn't help but look.
I wandered over the safety zone of the safari group and over to you.
You were so majestic, so intriguing.
I was just a person.
You were something out of a National Geographic show my father always showed me.
The days leading up to this safari I felt safe.
I felt at peace with myself.
I loved myself
Life was good
I never stopped to think about your great big teeth.
Your great strength.
And everything else that could overpower me.
I went over to you.
Confidence in every step.
You were so precious
You put your head under my hand and asked me to stroke your beautiful mane.
I never stopped to think that i was fully alone.
That at any moment you could strike.
And you did.
You took my hands and pinned them down.
You mauled my innocent body.
You picked at my insides like fresh meat
You took my innocence
The innocence of a body which had never been touched so forcefully.
A body so naive to the horrors of the world.
You tore me into tiny pieces till there was nothing left of me
My world collapsed.
I lost all love for myself.
I felt like nothing.
And for a moment I believed I was nothing
I felt hurt and betrayed
How is that something as beautiful as you could do something so horrific.
How could I have trusted a beast like you?
I didn't see the beast in you
I only saw your beauty
I wandered around trying to find anything you might have forgotten
Anything I could maybe salvage
But Ive come to realize that I can't take what you left behind and try to make it good again
I can only start over
show you that i am NOT the innocent person you took and tore apart
Because my heart is still beating
I am still breathing
I will become a bird and i will sore through the air with no worry of you ever catching me.
I am above you now.
I will always be above you
Hey Because I took what you left and I threw it away
I let myself start over
I forgave myself for trusting you
I grew
I conquered the feelings of nothingness you left me with
i found myself, loved myself
And now you can't touch me
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I was inspired by my own experience to write and really let go of my pain.