Why do you walk ahead of me you’re just going to slow me down, Why do smoke your cigarettes and blow the smoke in my face and expect me to be ok with it? Why is it always your way and never your fault when it’s you, holding me back, telling me there is light when all I can see is darkness. To tell me to fill in the gaps but you steel my crayons and you take my energy that I need to strive. You bully and abuse me then smile in my face like everything is ok. It’s not and you push it aside you’ve given me wounds and I can’t seem to cover them they reach across my arms and run along my thighs, self inflicted? yes, but it was you who triggered it. I try to stay away from and you convinced me to stay. If I stay, everything will remain the same. If i go you’ll shun me and belittle me, attack me and hurt me all so you can feel better about yourself. Play the victim card and blame me , you are the poison in the antidote bottle you are the withdrawal symptoms and you are the overdose you cause me pain, like losing someone dear. It sucks that the person I lost was none other than myself, I’ve lost and you’ve gained, I cry and you laugh you look down on me when all I need is your love I fail and you prosper where do I stand if I can’t even surrender I’m hurt and I’m tired, broken and torn. You will kill me and piss on my corpse just to bring me back and treat me the same, you’ll pull me from the void just to lock me in a cage. You’d do so much to the person you say that you love but your verbal abuse is more than enough, to break me down and pull me apart bit by bit by bit and it sucks be I have to swallow my pain an my suffering because I love you but I can’t stand you and i hate that i love you. But i have to because you’re my dad….