When you were in Germany,
you left me alone. I kept hoping
that my instincts were crazy,
like you kept saying they were.

Deep down, I knew I was right.
I knew all along that I was just a distraction.
“She’s helping you,” they said.
I saw Her touching you, but I didn’t say a word.

“She’s going through stuff,” you said.
“I’m the only one there for Her”
you said it to justify your selfish intentions.
I cried for nights, but I didn’t say a word.

July came. I found out that she needed you
more than she needed herself. She called you crying.
you left for weeks, not even saying goodbye.
but you still had Her in your mind.

July past. August crept into my heart.
I still hadn’t heard from you. I thought you
must’ve lost your way. But I guess you couldn’t have.
because you found Her.

You’re the one who left. But why do I feel like
a stranger locked in a glass? Is my punishment
watching Her make you happy? If it is,
God is more cruel than he seems.

I went to a party. You were there. So was she.
I tried to ignore your daggers. But I felt their
presence so clearly. You accused me of hurting Her.
Did it ever cross your mind that you are the criminal,
armed with every weapon of the soul?

Maybe I deserved it. Maybe I hurt her.
But maybe July hurt me more.