Yes, I feel

but not in the way I desire

everyday is a perpetual downfall

while I mostly see a stereotypical black

at some hours I see light getting closer

only to be disappointed

as I turn my head

and stare down the same crack in my soul

I am aware that I am alive

inspite of feeling the opposite

my corpse has somewhat of

a mundane schedule

starting with my eyes

as they open up to my current condition

always

the same

in return my brain makes sense

of my first sight

reassuring me that

Yes, I feel

feel the dread of letting myself

fall asleep

knowing that the morning light

will only bring me to the same place

a down fall

I can feel cold

it floods my senses

and I can tell it's not just from

my ajar window

despite my thoughts

beseeching my own spirit

to believe otherwise

No

this is a bitter cold

a blade of frozen expressions

arctic poisoning

dripping little by little into my veins

accumulating just enough

to provide me with tortured dreams

of my seemingly unattainable lust

Yes, I feel

but what's the purpose of feeling

if all you chase after

is the feeling

to not feel

at

all.