It's 4 am and I can't stop thinking about it.
I can't stop thinking about her.
It's been 2 years but I remember it all to clearly. Clothes on the floor and the scent of lit candles whistled though the air.
Past midnight, almost 2.
It started with a connection, deeper than neutrons and protons. I bumped into her and she gave a smile that looked a little. a little bit sad. that's when I realized she was the female version of me.
Past 2, now it's 3.
I walk past the kitchen and all I hear is the soothing voice of frank Sinatra. like a stream of water flowing through the mountainside. but it's wildly interrupted by the voices and  loud springs of an empty old mattress.
But trust me, it wasn't empty bc my fiancée and my bestfriend were there.
Another drink, now it's 4.
We knew it from the moment we started talking, she was in search for someone to make her alive. She felt empty just like me until we shared laughs and with judgmental eyes we decided to make it official, rumors is all I heard.
I ignored them but truth be told they never left my mind. At night was when they hit me all at once, like a tidal wave they flooded my thoughts. I died every night, but she made me happy. And I was alive.
5am
Life is measured by the choices we make. Whether it's a good one or bad one, but now I'm certain. I didn't choose to fall in love with you, it just happened. But you did choose, and I wasn't even an option to begin with.
which is why I write this poem, no this isn't a love poem, this is simply just a poem.