You’re not as I remembered
The loveable person I would come home too
Watching tv with mom or your horse races on your ipad
Or just relaxing and making blankets
Instead you were in a hospital bed in my room
In pain and hurting
I wasn’t used to you laying around
Me? Afraid? Unsure?
Yea I feel weak but I’m trying to stay strong
3-6 months is what they gave you
They said that the treatment wasn’t working
The cancer was winning
Too much medicine
Too many people in our home
I was at school when they told me
They told me you passed away
I just felt my heart dropped to my feet
I couldn’t believe it
I didn’t even get to say goodbye to you
I miss you
It’s not the same without you
I know you’re in a better place
But still 

There are moments when I wish things were normal 

Yet they aren't

They will never be the same

Not without you