Two voices in my head
Constantly Conflicting
Pushing and Pulling
Shoving and Shouting

One Person
Two Voices
And a dangerous game of Tug - A - War

One Voice
  Screams
     Selflessness!
It shouts
Fighting for my attention
Yelling at me to listen
Every argument striking me
As one would strike in War.

It begs me
To give and not receive
To love and not expect
To relinquish and not want

It reasons with me
Reminding me of my wrong
Pointing out my flaws
   My insecurities
Maybe, just maybe, if I listen to it
They will go away
And standing will be a better
     Purer
Version of myself

But…

What about me?
What about my happiness?
Does that not matter as well?

And that’s the other voice.
The one that
      Slithers
Making me doubt my Selfless Intentions

It waits
Lurking in the shadows
Readying itself to Pounce
Lying there in the tall grass for me to come along
So it can feast on it’s prey

It whispers
The desires of my heart
The cruelest of words
The arguments I know I cannot resist

It deludes me
Promising things it can’t give
Giving me a taste of what I know I can’t have
Hanging impossible temptations in front of face
Forcing me to beg for it

From its lips, dripping with deadly desire,
It sneers
   You could have it all
   You can have it all
   All you have to do is
   Say it

And somewhere in the back corners of my brain
   A distant shout
           No
Thus ending the never ending game of Tug - A - War