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Fantasy of Love
There's something funny about love.
The way it changes Why is that when we hear or read about other people's sad, pathetic lives we feel sorry? We have no reason to be, we didn't cause them these pains.
Sure is terrible what happened, but there's no cause for apology. I honestly think we apologize as a way to console the thought to be victimized.
Yet what we don't realize is that by apologizing we are somehow giving apology from the person who caused the real pain. Taking responsibility.
For that I will not say sorry, sorry's should come from the lips of the thought to be accused. I don't care if it makes me sound like a saint who speaks the truth, or a complete douche who hates the world. I'm a bit of both.
I've gone through loads of s*** in my life, but one thing I can't stand is when people tell me they're sorry. I'm my mind you're apologizing because you played some part in my pain and misery. If not then you have no reason to be apologize.
As of the moment I'm writing this, I've hit the Big Bang. For so long I've been living in the past. Drawing sour emotions from blood drawn events in which have caused me pain, misery, and anger. But I've come to know what is true, I live in a world where true love doesn't exist and is even harder to find. Full of saints who speak the truth and douches who hate the world.
It's a point we all reach in life. When the classic facades of humanity have been stripped off, and all the fear you felt is slowly swept away to find is just as bad as you expected. Just as bad as you heard. Life as we know it is basically over beings that it could end at any moment. So we feel the need to prove that we're not just a waste of space. Yet I trying to do so, you're proving that exact point. Throwing yourself around until you've left nothing but extra space for the rest of us. It's sickening to think that this genius race has boiled down to these bumbling idiots.
Truth of the matter is, nobody is ever really ready to face death on its own, you could be as old as Yoda (lucky you) and still have regrets long since expired. Even those who contemplate suicide at some point realize that they're not completely ready to move on.
Like in a scenario they want to die, but the second a gun is placed to their heads, a plea for life is made. Holding on by a thin thread even if they realize this too late. Which in that case you're s*** out of luck.
you
I mean, like, it must be pretty big
Why?
I don't know
Nor do I care to
PSYCH!
Of course I want to
What living, breathing person on this earth isn't the least bit curious
And that's where my friends laugh at me or judge me
Or both.
And that's where my questions stem from
Out of curiosity I'll ask, "do you like it? Do you like being in love?"
"Do you like the fact that you've spent your whole life playing it safe?"
It's sad, really
To think these people are so sure of their lives
So sure their love, that the first guy who walks by they assume is the last of them. Closing off your mind to the thought of a temporary happiness
Being semi - in love can be good enough, right?
Hmm, I guess not
With all the lonely single women stuck watching the endless list of Twilight movies on repeat.
Hoping to one day get a chance to have that love
Yes, because everyone nowadays just has to be forced into an awkward love triangle
Especially when it's clear who you'll choose.
To be completely honest this more than just ruined love for me a little.
It's actually totally ruined
Because even knowing that Bella's awkward love life is as good as it gets
Too many people want it
I don't want that
Do you know how weird it would be to have my best friend in love with me?
No wonder Jacob can't stand her.
Not to be mean or anything
But the whole movie is based on pedophilia
Edward who is 100-something years old falls in love with Bella who is only 17
Then 18 year old Jacob falls in love with Bella's daughter who is only -wait for it- 8 years old. Please tell me this isn't what millions of people want. To find a hot older guy to fall in love with you. He'll get arrested, and you won't see him until you've got gray hairs.

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Another entry from my journal. This one is supposed to be a dry humor.
There's nothing special about it, I just have a feeling that it's something that someone out there needed to hear.