Maybe I should’ve chased after you that day.
But i didn’t want to keep you from things that made you happy.
I used to think that maybe it was okay to feel empty without your touch.
Because your love was like the rain.
When it came, it drowned my skin with the trickles that seeped
into my cracks, and made me feel whole again.

Now, whenever I go out in the rain, I think of you.
Because now the rain drowns me, like how I used to look
into your eyes and knew that one day, I was going to be
swallowed in a deep malevolent sea.

You were the rain that filled my lungs with the smell of
the warm earth and pavement, and when I breathed in,
I was intoxicated with miserable memories.

Your love seemed to hang around me like a literal
black raincloud. I couldn’t escape the way I felt.
Your voice was like the thunder that raged through the sky,
and rang into my ears.

I felt like the lightning, the way a million things went on
inside, and when triggered, I cracked in the same way.
It was loud, and bright, and dangerous.
Oh, but when it rains, I crave your lips against mine.
The drops that make their way down my tongue,
linger there like a bittersweet kiss.

And when I look up, I look up into the gray sky, and I think
How could I let you go, how could I when all I see is you.
So, maybe I should’ve chased you that day.
But you being happy was something I couldn’t do. Sadly.
And your happiness meant more to me than the rain.