Being alone never felt alone like being with others does,
Wanting to have a voice yet too scared to even speak,
They talk,
They whisper,
They care about themselves and only the ones closest to them,
Every glance,
Look,
Giggle,
Feels as though the world is conspiring against you,
And you’re at the center of it all,

Acceptance and courage feels as though it’s the hardest part,
Your voice shaking as you can't even muster up the courage to speak,
A wave of worry consumes you as you stare out at the world with clear eyes,
This world is so beautiful once you get past the darkness,
This world is so beautiful when you stare out with unclouded eyes,
This world is so ugly when you’re standing alone.

Their voices and actions become background noise.
All that’s left is you,
And this empty broken world,
Consumed with war,
Consumed with violence,
Consumed with hatred,
Yet created with such beauty,
Leaving both your body and mind mesmerized,

You think too much,
You care too much,
You get attached too easily,
You find yourself alone in a world with 7.3 billion others,
7.3 billion people that don't get it,
7.3 billion people you’re too scared to talk to,
7.3 billion people that are in another world unlike your own,
7.3 billion people…
That you can’t muster up the courage to speak with.

Alone.

Never have I ever felt so alone…
Suddenly sadness turns into depression,
Hitting you with a wave,
Drowning you as you stare to the surface,
So serien,
So peaceful,
So tainted and chaotic,
Taking hold of everything you were and want to be,
Drowning that along with your body,
Sinking into an abyss that no one else can even perceive,

Because this is YOUR mind,
This is YOUR sadness,
This is YOUR realm that you're living in,
This is not THEIR darkness to see,
This is YOUR depression,
YOUR weakness,
YOUR loneliness,
YOUR beautiful and different ways of thinking,
Seems to leave everyone else not knowing what to say,

This beauty and sadness all belong to you,
This chaotic and ugly world is here for you to see,
Looking beyond text,
Between the words,
Further than just perception,

I am not my depression,
I am not my flaws,
I am not my past,
I am beautiful,
I see things others don’t,
I am courageous,
I am me,
And your words and labels do not define me.

I define what I am,
I define what I stand for,
I define who I am,

Not you,
Not depression,
Not even myself can and will change how I think,

I may be alone,
But I refuse to drown,
I refuse to fall,
I refuse to lose sight of myself,
I have never felt so alone,
Not once in my entire life,
But I will never allow them to take away who I am,
Not once have I ever felt so alone,
And so crowded all at the same time,

I’m not really alone,
My thoughts are here beside me,
And I’m fine with this.

Because in a world consumed with hatred and sadness,
There is so much beauty,
Yet our eyes are clouded,
But I refuse to be consumed by the darkness,
I refuse to look past the beautiful things in this world,
I am not truly alone,
I just feel so,
And I accept this.