As I sit in this classroom, I feel alone. No matter how hard I tried, I could never seem to be at ease. No matter how loud I made my music, I could never escape. I just felt like I wanted to be in a dark room by myself, door locked, and never come out unless it was for something I wanted or needed.

Because of this, I feel as though I’m trapped inside of a cage. But for me, it’s much more than just some cage meant for an animal. It’s a cage meant for something bigger, but not always for something better. My cage is like the heavens and hell. It’s something that’s always going to be here. It’s something that people can never escape or run from. It’s something that you should be brave towards. It’s something that you should be afraid of. It’s something that has caused me to be a coward towards things in my life.

My cage is the reason why I’m the way I am. My cage has caused so much grief and agony. Because of my cage, it makes me feel as though I’m unwanted. It makes me feel as though I’m not needed. That I’m not one of a kind. That I’m just here to be here, as if I wasn’t meant to be.

Because of my cage, no matter how much therapy I receive it will never work. My cage is the reason why I’m not able to figure my own self out. Or let others figure me out either. Because of my cage, I tend to treat others like a situation with a door and two people.

There is a person in the inside behind the door and then there’s someone else in front of the door trying to get in. The person in front of the door is making a noise, but doesn’t say anything, or make any other noise but just one noise. The person behind has two choices. Either they can take a risk and open the door, or they can just not answer it.

If the person behind the door chooses to open the door there is a problem that they face each and every time. They are able to go to the door, but it doesn’t have a window to look out of. They are not able to see what is outside. The person behind the door doesn’t know if there is just a person, or if it is something else. If there is another person in front of the door, the person behind the door has to remember it can be two different types of people. There can be a friend or an enemy. But because the person behind the door aren’t able to see what is in front of them they aren’t able to determine. So every time they open the door it could be a nice friend or the devil in a stranger. And because the person behind the door can’t look through the door, they don’t know if it is someone looking for a victim, or just a friend.

Because of my cage, the person behind the door makes any and everything bigger than they really are. Because of my cage, the person behind the door isn’t able to make the choice to make situations easier for themselves.

My cage is a battle everyday.
And cage is my mind.
My cage is my body.
My cage is my soul.
My cage is ME!