Even though you married my mother 7 years after I was born
you are my father, you always will be
I don’t think I ever saw a glimpse of
anger firing from your fist or mouth as a child
your big ears and weird voices and pirate figurines never
scared me out of loving you
because you were everything I was looking for in a best friend
but I know that you have become a different man
parts of your body have ceased to function the way they’re supposed to
no more than a glass of red at dinner
I feel empty and lost
when we talk about what the future holds
but you reassure me that everything will be okay with
just warms smiles and your wrinkly skin
turned purple and blue from the hospital’s needles
I am sorry for being so cold towards you
that day you told me to put on a hat and gloves before walking to the bus
for so many years
you were the sun in my solar system and I need you to know that
I want you to be a part of my life
decades after we spread your white powder into the bay where you were born
because you are my father
even if we don’t share the same DNA
and I love you so so much