I didn't follow the recipe given to me.
Instead of adding love,
I added the hate you gave to me
On a silver platter.
As if it was something holy
That should be accepted with gratitude
And not the resentment you received.
Instead of adding purity and innocence
I added the corruption you placed upon me
With your dirty hands
Always searching
Never seeming to find just what they're looking for
Always going back for more.
Instead of adding beauty
I added the ugliness
Your words showed me I was.
The mirror proved this true
With every stolen glance I took,
Always hoping to see something different
And always being disappointed
By the reflection I eventually shattered.
But what good is a culinary delight
Without it being properly prepared?
Because of you,
I was put away in the Utah heat,
The sun slowly cooking me.
And when I was finally released,
I was no longer my ingredients.
I was something new.
Because of what you gave me,
I became one hell of a treat.
No longer was I hate,
Or corruption,
Or ugliness.
Instead I emerged
With love,
Purity and innocence,
And beauty.
It took all that negativity
To teach me what to be:
The real me.