Momma always said that hate was too strong of a word
To direct towards someone,
And instead of spewing words of spite
We should spread hope and love.
You taught me
And you taught me well
Like my A-B-C’s,
My P’s and Q’s,
Nursery rhymes,
And the back of my hand.

You taught me that
Revenge was always a dish best served cold,
Like frozen macaroni dinners
And when looking to your arsenal
You should always take love to war
Instead of hate.
My fists are held high,
Clenched on thoughts never
Dared to be spoken

Until now.

I love how you’ve distorted the
Image of the girl I once knew,
The person who stares back at me in the mirror
Makes me sick.
A whole lot of nothing special
And when I look at my reflection
I can’t even muster enough courage
To tell myself I’m
Beautiful,
Because that word digs into my side
With a knife that waits there for you to
Twist it.

I love when you wake me up with your screams
As if the cries into my pillow the night before
Weren’t enough.
I love how you look at me like I’m a freak.

I love when you make me feel worthless.
Like yesterdays’ news,
Sitting on the curb,
Unread.
I love how you make me feel like I’ll
Never make it in this world because
Champions don’t start off like failures.

I love how you make me feel
Constantly on the verge of tears,
Wishing I could throw it all up
Into oblivion
So that maybe I could go with it.
Wishing I could turn myself inside-out
So you could see just how much
Damage you’ve inflicted.

I love how there’s a hole inside
My chest that may never be filled,
Because you’ve lead me to believe that I’ll never be
Good enough
For anyone.
I love how terrified I am
Of my future, because who’s going to love a girl
That can’t even love herself?

I don’t want to live like this.

I love how miserable you make me.
I love when someone peculiar passes you
And you say it’s because they didn’t get enough
Love as a child.
And if they’re childhood was deprived of love
Then what the hell do you call this?

I love how terrified I am of
Growing up to be just like you.

I love when you tell me that I shouldn’t
Take everything so seriously.
If we’re not supposed to take things seriously,
How are we supposed to take them?
And if a person doesn’t speak to our heart
What’s the point of speaking at all?

And tell me if I fall in the woods and no one’s around
To hear it, do I still make a sound?
Or do you gather around me to say words that
Were never meant for my ears
Like a deaf person at a symphony,
I can still hear the vibrations of your unjust thoughts.

Will you sit on my rotten stump and wonder,
Why I broke under the pressure of the storm
And will you hear me as I whisper,
I love you.
I love you.
I love how you made it come to this
I love how brittle you’ve made me.
I love how you’re too blind to realize,
You were the termite that stripped away my bark
Revealing everything bad and nothing good.

In the middle of the storm
The tree jumps and breaks and snaps
Just as my heart
Grows cold.

I love how you’ve left me to fend for myself
In a world not meant for
Dreamers.

But here I am
Fractured,
Crumbled,
Broken on the forest floor.
Will you notice your mistake before it’s too late?

There’s a storm brewing.
Don’t let me shatter
Please,
I need you.