Sometimes, I hate being part of this family. Of this town. Of this culture. Of this race.
Sometimes, I wish i was an entirely other person, someone who has it easy. Sometimes I wish i didnt know my mother or my father, my sister and brother. Sometimes I wish i didnt know myself.
Sometimes I wish there was a way out of things. Sometimes, i get frustrated that i dont have the power to save myself. Sometimes i wish I could see the bright light where everything gets better. Sometime i wish i was as smart as the man who created the theory of revolution. Sometimes i wish i was pretty. Sometimes i wish i was greatful.
Sometimes i wish i was an only child so i'd be taken seriously. Sometimes i wish someone would stumble accross this so they could laugh or cry or scream at me. Sometimes i wish i could show this invisible talent i think i possess to other people. Sometimes i back down because i am terrified. Sometimes I laugh at myself.
Sometimes i wish i wasnt this vague character, so i could say things straight forward. Sometimes i realize a diary or a journal wont get me through life. those are the times that i cry.
Sometimes i get so dissapointed whether it be because of myself or my family or a number or a letter, that i cant help but cry myself to sleep. Or to breakdown in the shower.
Sometimes im so fed up with being this vague character. Sometimes im sick of trying to be this aspiring depressed poet when i know im not. Sometimes, i realize i have no talent.
I hate looking back on work and never being proud. I have no creative talent. Writing isnt my thing obviously. And sometimes thats what makes me crumble