I'm broken.
I feel that I can't be fixed.
I'm running from something.

I just can't do anything right.
Wouldn't it just be easier,
if I didn't have to do anything?
Then, there would be no chance of right or wrong.

I could show them all that I am broken.

No one would understand.
They would say: "Where is she? That giddy girl with the bow and lip gloss." "Is she sick?" "I haven't heard from her in days?"...
I hide it all so well.

I hide it so well, that
half the time I forget the hurt.

Only when I mess up again do I realize the thread of books and sports that keep me busy can not mend my breaks,
for even thread can be broken too.

Of course, I am strong enough.
I can pretend that thread can hold me together and that nothing is even wrong.
I can be strong like every day.
But do I want to be?

Everything inside me is a contradiction.
I want to please people.
I want to be the best I can be.
But, how can I be these things
when I feel broken?

I'm running from something.
I am running from myself.
I am running from the world.
I am running from God.

God, where are you?