Quickly do the storms that roar above the seas change to find a calm; it is a fleeting moment- from drunken waves thrashing against its brothers, swiftly shifting to a peaceful seascape; a blink of the eye. As swiftly as the ocean settles was how swiftly your unpredictable emergence into my life had been. You are the calm amidst my storm: a steady, concealed harmony within life’s chaotic symphonies.

You never see the sailors abandoning their posts to admire the beauty of the violent tempest approaching. Beauty and admiration is often sacrificed during times of great struggle and strife. You have to understand.

I wish that among this chaos, I could halt from the duties of reality to mesmerize the way your rainclouds grow darker and lower in this obscure firmament; to admire the way the acid waves turn thin as if by magic; to appreciate you the way you deserve. You have to understand.

I am living in a storm; A storm of tension, stress, anxiety, sadness, confusion, and hopelessness. The horizon has never seemed so far away. I grow smaller in the commotion and disarray. You have to understand.

When I find myself on my knees, praying that it will be over, the thoughts of the beauty of the storm are what help me find the light.

It takes time. It takes time. It takes time.

Storm? You beautiful, beautiful storm? Do not shun yourself because of me. Do not wait for me to pronounce my love for the beauty God has bestowed before me. My appreciation could not have been found in my words. I can’t shout to you from the highest point of my ship and tell you what you need to hear without the danger of falling into the endless abyss that whispers into my ears. I can’t give to you what I cannot give myself.

It takes time it takes time it takes time. I’m so sorry, it takes time.