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The Voices In My Head
“The Voice of Anger”
Word Count: 170
You have no friends. Period. Let me just hand that piece of
Depressing information to you right now.
Nobody likes you. You’re such a dislikeable person.
You are a social outcast.What do you be-
Lieve makes you likeable, hmm? Your personality, your
Brains, your“know-how”?Forget it all! You have no-
Thing! You are a complete waste of space! Do you hope for a
Better life sometimes? One where you didn’t have
A voice like me bringing you down all the time?Well, forget
That, too! This voice in your head will just get lou-
Der! I’ll bomb your ears with my own insults as well as those
Of the rest of this school!THERE IS NO ESCAPE!
YOU MUST FEEL HATRED TOWARDS OTHERS!After all, what have you
Done to them to deserve this treatment? NOTHING!
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!If you have no friends,
Then do you know what you do have?
People you despise.
Bullies. Call them by any other name, they have to target something:
“The Voice of Logic”
Word Count: 154
Hmph. Do you actually listen to that
Angry brute?The Voice of Anger has absolutely no
Reason, which is why he often loses his
Disputes.Think about it. Do you really have no compan-
Ions? Those people you play basketball with,
That you discuss videogames with, that you spread rumors
With; you don’t consider any of them as
Friends?If not, then what are they? Just little pawns in a lar-
Ger game of chess that will eventually
End with you winning it all? No offense dude, but you are
Not that amazingly great at chess. You are
Always better at sports with a ball.These people that you
Have met and will probably remember for
Years, you don’t like any of those people?
You have all you need to succeed in life: brains, personality, and logic.
People like to have friends with these kinds of traits.
Just think about that for a while.
“The Voice of Depression”
Word Count: 234
He’s right, you know. The Voice of Logic. He’s pretty smart when
It comes to this kind of stuff.But then again,
What use are those friends if you only have a few?What is
The friend total today? Well let’s see, four of
Your friends just left you, so that brings the total to about…
What an unfortunate number. I never
Liked numbers. They always seemed to reveal horrible truths.
You might as well give up on those 6 friends. That
Number will just keep dropping. That’s one of the difficulties
Of being in a military family.
You never can make really good friends.
Do you like that, William? Always being the social
Outcast in your school? Take a look at your previous school social lives.
They were all the same.
You didn’t speak German as well as the other kids in Germany. Your Rank: Social Outcast
You were labeled as a “nerd” in Virginia because you were so smart. Your Rank: Nerdy Social Outcast
You didn’t know a single person in D.C., and eventually you just became friends with more social outcasts like yourself. Your Rank: Leader of the Social Outcasts
You’re overpowered by the fact that all the Europeans in Albania (except for Albanians) hate America. Your Rank: Hated Social Outcast.
What hope do you have left, William?
You know what you should do know? It’s quite simple:
“The Voice of Wrong”
Word Count: 176
You know, just because you don’t have any friends
Doesn’t mean you can’t get new ones.“But how would I get an-
Y?” you ask. Well, let’s bring up my list of tools:
Bribery, blackmailing, stealing, force, and violence.
It’s simple: You use the power of fear and persuasion
To get people to be your friends. Fear has worked
As a powerful weapon throughout world his-
Tory.Sure, people wouldn’t exactly want to be your
Friend because you would be extremely cruel to
Them, but they would have to be your friend if they didn’t want
To be harmed.Instantly, you would have dozens
Of people flocking towards you wanting to be your friend in
Order to keep their reputations safe. Be
Warned though; this method can get as complex as a Sherlock
Holmes mystery.After all, who ever said
Making friends was easy? If it gets hard, don’t be alarmed.
Let me just tell you two things, William:
There is no better way to get friends than through force,
And 2) Violence is always the answer.
“The Voice of Right”
Word Count: 138
Don’t listen to him, the Voice of Wrong. He’s just a sly trick-
Ster who will make you think so hard that you’ll start
Hearing drums in your head. He is right that making friends is
Not easy. But he’s wrong when saying that ma-
King friends isn’t pleasing.The hard route in making friends tends
To be the more, well, friendly, while the route
That this Voice of Wrong is trying to convince you of does
Not end nicely.You may think that you have no-
Body to make friends with.
The truth is you are surrounded by many possible friends.
In fact, seven billion.
This may be a hard time for you to make friends, with your family moving around everywhere, but just remember one thing:
There’s plenty of fish in the sea to be hunting.