you told me you missed me
yet never came home

you thought I didn’t know
you told me not to smoke
yet you had to sneak into your own room
and go out on our deck
to smoke
thinking no one saw
but I did
I knew what you hid
behind every smile
every closed door
you were losing everything for a cigarette
a joint
and you didn’t even care
but I did
I wanted you to be happy
after all
I am your sister
I’m glad that the past is behind you
you’re getting better now
but I’ll never forget the late nights
and hearing mom cry in the other room
crying for her daughter
lost
in the land of dreams