Behind these eyes,
Sit a million lies,
Collected over time.
?Like a lead anchor tied to my heart,
Thrown and swung into the ocean’s dark.
To the deepest trench, it shall sink,
Dragging me down--
Losing reality as I reach for the surface.
Losing my sanity, within one blink.

Settling to the bottom of the sea,
I could not utter one pathetic plea.
For I had used the disguise,
The disguise that secretly told those million lies.

The disguise was no costume,
It was no clothing,
For the disguise had become me,
And I had known--
I had known,
The false longing and hope I feigned to own.

Shared with one soul,
Injected into his mind,
The lies, the disguise,
He had believed,
but I,
I was the one who had deceived.
Guilt consumed me,
I could be sure.
I was punished by the lie’s evil lure.
For I had believed,
Life would be simple,
If I could just make it up,
If I could just pretend.
My lie was uncovered,
My conscience hit the sorry dead-end.

I sat in that trench,
The sea flowing above me,
The dark surrounding me.
Such darkness, and I did not cry--
I had become my disguise--
And then I realized--
That I--
I was--
The lie.