When I'm alone...I think:
Why do I not have better friends?
Why am I here?
Why do I love and despise being alone all the time?
Why do I feel like I need someone's love to confirm that I'm worthy of love?
Worthy to be someone's "girl"?
Worthy to hold their heart?
Even when they may not be worthy to hold mine?
Sometimes at my very lowest..
I forget that there's a world outside of here.
That there's an entire world and somewhere. Somewhere in that great abyss. Someone feels just like I do.
But what if they don't?
What if I'm waiting for them, but they aren't waiting for me.
What if they may be MY one true love, but they've had love already.
They're basing their experience with me from one they've had previously.
What if they settled with me because they were tired.
What if it's not love from them, but resignation.
Is that what settling down is?
Not settling down with their love.
But just settling.
Settling for the last girl they meet as they get older.
When they're tired of wooing.
Tired of waking up alone?
I'm alone.