The glance of disdain… cut... through my flesh,

The crimson river of life carrying away my sorrows,

That salty ocean adorning my eyes,

The grass blade…obstructing what used to be me.

The wounds take away the pain,

The pain I feel inside my body,

The pain I feel when I see you,

The pain caused by your glance.

Those warm angelic eyes,

Those eyes that were my light,

Those eyes whose sharp gaze sliced through my mind,

Those same eyes I dream of.

I dream of you,

I dream of us,

I dream of beautiful moments that will not be repeated.

I wake up for that goodbye.

That goodbye that never came,

That goodbye destroyed my world,

A goodbye that didn't only behead a friendship,

A goodbye that killed who I was.

I was a disgusting person,

But that didn't die,

I was a good person,

But that didn't die.

The one who trusted you died,

The one who would give everything for you died,

The one who wished to be around your arms died,

But somehow, the one who loves you still stands…

I hate to admit it... I hate to think of it…

I love to remember it… I love to wish I had you once more…

Those feelings escape any grave I bury them in,

They haven’t chained to my body anymore.

Often… Sometimes… Every day…

I lose track of my actions,

I find myself writing letters I’ll never give you,

I find my eyes locked on your image.

Is it me? Then why are you everywhere I look?

From a rose in my garden…  The paintings of Aphrodite…

I ran away from it… I crossed oceans and deserts…

You were still there, you are always there.

In my dreams, you cover me with your arms.

Those arms covered in spines drive me mad…

It's a crucifixion… It’s heaven…

It’s an illusion that I would do anything to reach.

I wondered.

I decided,

It's worth it.

You are worth it.

Please tear me apart… Destroy every memory I have of you…

Use me, break me…

Just listen to what my body is eager to say…

Just one time, one time is enough,

Even if it vanishes me…

Give the “me” that loves you… a reason to stand.