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Mirror talk
I see her every morning and everyday she’s someone new,
On Monday morning she was hideous,
There was nothing she could’ve done to fix it,
Her shifting her hair did nothing but expose her ears,
And God would they laugh if they saw her with them,
So I told her this and she cried,
B*tch.
On Tuesday morning she looked slightly better,
Her hair was no longer a black strand of nothingness,
Strands of her,
But then she turned around, and I saw the fat that insulated her stomach,
She tried to suck in, to convince herself it didn’t look so bad,
So I told her she was fat, worthless and ugly, and she cried,
P*ssy.
On Wednesday morning she came at me with confidence,
Determination melted like wax onto her skin making it thick,
I laughed and remind her of her grades,
Pointed out the spots on her face,
Greeted the second chin that hung under her first,
She tried scratching and pulling it off,
She couldn’t,
Idiot.
On Thursday morning she avoided me,
But I saw her in the afternoon,
Her checking to see if her PE kit looked alright,
I just stared at her thighs,
I think she got the message,
She left there with a frown,
handstitched on by me,
Baby.
On Friday morning she looked alright,
Her hair was right,
Skin glowed and under the clothes you couldn’t see the bulge,
I told her this,
She told me to shut up or else she’d end me,
I asked her if she was going to eat today,
She said no,
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I wrote this poem when I was feeling very down and wanted a way to express the actions that I feel take place every time I look into a mirror. There are times when I believe that it is actually my head talking to me. I feel like a lot of people can relate to this experience and wanted a way to let them know that over people felt that way too. The one word lines at the end of each stanza are words that I hear daily from myself. I hope that this poem highlight that in real life that our biggest bully and the thing that unconditionally has the ability to loathe us to the point of defeat is ourselves. Recognising this is a very important step to healing. Unfortunately I have not managed to defeat my bully, but I am working on it.