Clorox wipes disinfect the groceries,

birthdays are ruined by the start of the pandemic,

trips are canceled and social lives slowly cease to exist.

Zoom takes over the world and numbers fill the news: death count, case count, no more beds, no more ventilators. 

Little freshman me burns out, 

out of motivation…energy…right till I’m nocturnal. 

As I scrolled through my apps, 

I watched as others lived their lives. 

I knew I had to be responsible and do my part, but a part of me was always jealous. 

That their parents let them go to school in-person, eat out, go to parties, and so on. 

I did it all only to get sick two years later. 

The first symptom appearing during a swim meet, 

my lack of swimming ability further worsened-

Debilitated as I barely pushed my way to the final lap. 

I struggled to breathe, my lungs weak. 

Even though my efforts fell short, I don’t regret doing the responsible thing. The exception among those who showed their cold hearts, risking the lives of strangers, all for a temporary moment to add to their memories of this time. 

Fun instead of dark despair.