You got a pay raise,

Even bought a brand-new, shiny car.

You’ve embarked on a Bahamas cruise vacation for 7 extravagant days,

but to me, that was not pleasant news to hear that you have made it this far.

You finally bought a new designer bag,

Gucci, Prada, Versace, Louis.

Wow, how envious and not happy I am to unfortunately hear what you can snag,

insecurity, envy and me.

You’re tall, beautiful, working out, staying motivated, and finally getting so thin.

But me, I lack motivation. You get everything that I’ve ever wanted, but cannot afford.

Oh my god, I feel like I can never ever win.

I have to actually work my hardest for things instead of getting my parents’ undeserved rewards.

I just wish I was happier in my own awful, hideous skin.

I had so many goals I was working towards.

I worked out and lost so much weight, but I still will never believe that I am thin.

I am ugly, chubby and weak in my psyche.

I suffer from severe mental health sicknesses, even eating disorders.

All of these issues, evil thoughts and this suffering is consuming me,

And regarding all of these thoughts, my brain shall act as a hoarder.

The long-lasting affects you are plaguing upon me, for each, you are unable to see.

Despite these walls that I put up around my psyche, the mental disorders still manage to hop over each and every border.

Insecurity, envy and me.