Never mourn by yourself, they said.

Although they could not feel what you feel.

It will get better, they said.

When they lay eyes on the smile framed by black and white,

When they heard the cries of women and the low murmurs of men.

When they feel the wooden box and the soft melancholy in the air,

They will know what it is like to lose someone important. 

There are five stages of grief,

One, denial.

You are on the floor shaking your head, as if simply shutting down all your senses will minimize your pain.

Cannot process the reality nor your loss, as if your life is depending on it.

Vision blurred with tears, the pain in your head makes you light-headed and wondering if you are simply dreaming.

Two, anger.

Anger burning in the chest, swallowing your last bit of clear thought.

Anger towards your passing one, why did they leave you behind.

Anger towards yourself, tired of your own whining and sleepless nights, wondering when this phase of emotions will pass.

Three, bargaining.

Your want for structure and purpose, your want to regain control brought you together.

You tell yourself again and again, “This is not the end of the world”, you think you are done with the mourning but little did you know you’re still stuck on three.

Four, depression.

They say grief is the father of depression and it is, as the grieving person you come to the reality and certainty that he or she will not come back.

The aching part of your heart breaks into million pieces and slowly snow down to you, painting your eyebrows white.

You sit in your reign of sadness, frozen in solitude. 

Five, acceptance.

Day by day, you learn how to live without the one you lost.

You kept on living even though you spent so much time running out of the shadow of grief.

Instead of denying, you listen to your needs; you move, you change, you grow, you evolve.

Accepting the truth seems like a large amount of effort and energy, doesn't it?

What if you had someone to help you through these stages?

One, denial.

Someone special entered your room and revealed the truth to you.

Disbelief, shock but at least you can cry in a warm embrace.

You’ll find the smallest piece of emotion which smells like strawberry in a cloud of dolour and misery.

Two, anger.

Uncontrollable anger growing in your chest, extreme temper send you into overdrive.

But at least there is someone there, understand your strange behaviours and calm you down.

Steamy lava with bright red colour dripping like venom but calm by black and stones.

Three, bargaining.

You say “I had enough, I can’t keep going like this”, there always be someone waiting and helping you to build your fortress in the battle of depression.

Doesn’t it feel wonderful if someone helps you to pick up your life piece by piece?

Four, depression.

You live in your little castle, shutting everyone out, but there will always be someone who will lead the way.

They lead you out of the castle, out of the blizzard of emotions and out of depression.

Five, acceptance.

You look forward to your new life without him or her but you know they are in your memories.

You know for sure once you look back there will be a person telling you, don’t look back, keep moving.

Never mourn by yourself.

Mourn with people, because they give you unbelievable strength and hope in the dark days covered by grey clouds that are called “grief”.