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Powdered Scars
A seed planted and a baby is split to halves
Crystals sprouting from branches, watercolor painted paths
Purple trees growing to touch the silk sky
Those springtime pink flowers kissing small brown eyes
Another mark on the wall
Two years old and two feet tall
She’s learning the tongue spoken by her mother
The syllables coated with beauty falling one after another
Happy birthday they sing
All the joys age 8 will bring
Returning with presents and smiles now sore
They ask her “why must we leave our shoes at the door?”
Thoughts hunt within her brain, pluck areas unexplored
Oh how she’d flourish with that pale hair, never ignored
And eyes the same color as blueberries on a harsh day
A crystal fell when she wished her foreign away
Middle school sprinkling poison to waste
Belly-laughs when she’s asked how dog tastes
Involuntary smiles while they pull their eyes back
As they poke her ancestors who gifted her the slant
The dulcet melody she once cherished, now overly hazy
As her grandmother calls worried for her safety
Following news she heard of attacks on those like their own
The crystals fall faster like rainfall, those branches now stand alone
Yet today she replants them
And they’ll sprout shielding the amort
For through the violent war
She finds comfort where she didn’t before
Blindfolded she finds strength
Passed down from that half she kept at arms length
Removing the blindfold she’ll stare at the girl in the reflection
And for the first time
She doesn’t see an infection.

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For as long as I've been alive, I've grappled with a sense of identity or belonging after not being fully Japanese or fully white. Finding crumbs of love and acceptance through this past year, I've been able to submerge little by little out of the quicksand of feeling misplaced. Replacing those feelings with words, I shaped it into Powdered Scars.