1

it’s been a while since I’ve danced with this feeling.

feels like fury, 

like fire on my tongue,

like my brother accidentally hitting a golf ball

into the power line in my backyard,

sparks of electric screaming up my spine,

like scarlet headache and

burning old love letters,

something you and him both know

I never do

2

you told me not to lie to myself.

so instead of singing a song

about the way this hurts

here’s a melody you won’t soon forget.

I love the way you make me explode.

like the sick feeling of burnt nicotine, 

the unease in your stomach

when you know we’re about to fight again

because you messed up again, 

because you knew it when you told me

and you know now

it’ll never be the same

3

I don’t cry anymore.

I breathe in the anger and when I exhale

I look like the dark goddess

from your worst nightmare,

and I’m not coming back, 

I’ll be sitting right here

for you to dream about

and regret

4

I can’t wait for summer.

for when the sun bids us farewell

and paints the world red

as a parting gift, 

a tribute to both fervent beauty

and incredible betrayal.

I can’t wait

until we watch the same sunset

and for some reason, 

you find yourself terrified. 

because you know.

after me, 

you’ll forget how to feel alive