When I was six I was afraid of spiders

Not now

When I was eight I was scared of snakes

Then I saw a cat kill one

Then I was scared of cats

Still haven't quite gotten over that one

When I was twelve I was scared of heights,

Or better yet, unprotected edges.

Now I'm scared of losing

Not in a competitive way

I'm scared of losing people

Losing the people that I love most in this world

It's terrifying

Believe me, I know

When I was seven my dad told me he had cancer 

And that if anything happened to him

I would have to be good and help my mom

When I was eight the cancer left

When I was 13 it came back

When I was 14 it got worse

Then I lost him  

I'm still scared of those unprotected edges

Maybe it's the idea that if you slip

There is nothing there to catch you

No guard rail

No net

Nothing

You're just gone

I'm scared of death

I always will be

I'm scared of never coming back

But I'll get to see my dad

And that snake the cat killed, poor thing

And that's the reason life is valuable

Because it ends