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no plans
December 23, 2018
you
shaved your head
color fell from your scalp
pinks and reds and blues
came to rest at your feet
your dye-stained hands grasped mine
and guided them to what was left
it’s soft, i say again
yes, you say
yes, it is
i run my fingers over the bristly hairs
they tickle my palm
they always do
you smile like you aren’t there
am i doing something wrong? i ask
no, you say
and it sounds false
don’t lie to me, i say
i’m not, you say, i’m not, i swear
i don’t know if it sounds like the truth
i don’t know anything these days
i feel distanced from you
your plans that used to need me
no longer do
and me
i have no plans
without you
© Anonymous
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I wrote this about my girlfriend in the days just before we ended our relationship. While the split was amicable and I accepted when it happened that it was inevitable, it still affected me more than I let on. Finding out that someone you love and who once loved you no longer feels the same way hurts, and I wrote this to help sort through the confusion I felt during that time.