I lay paralyzed attempting to blink the strain out of my restless eyes in the warmth of the woven overlay of my daybed, that would on a normal summer’s night welcome  me into the abyss of slumber. This was no average attack of insomnia that had previously haunted my rest, but instead something worse, absolutely something much more sinister. In fact, this malicious monster had a name that many seem to call self doubt. Self doubt quietly swept its way down deep into the core of my inner esteem and dug its dagger like claws into my every thought and action. On this particular night ‘it’ made its way into persistently calling itself to my attention, blocking every other exit sign my mind tried searching for. “You will never be enough” it repeatedly began mocking me. Its booming voice  began to utter vindictive phrases such as, “You need to be way skinnier if you want to fit in. You’re not even pretty so just stop trying. You think your intelligent-ha think again.” It ran my mind over hurdles and through hoops for what seemed like an eternity and just when I felt like the monster had finally subsided, it in turn swiftly came back with vengeance. “Just shut up already” I murmured back, not loud enough to where the thing could hear. I wondered why I was so afraid to subdue the beast from its hurtful reign. Was it because I believed there was truth in what its snarling voice was telling me? Am I really not enough? “You know what” I declared as I began reassuring myself; shining the light to conquer the darkness, “The monster’s right, maybe you’re not ‘enough’.  Maybe your way more than what the eye of the public sees.” All along I had cowered in fright, creating this burly creature of pure figmented illusions of what I thought others expected of me, when in all actuality, I had the answer to my problems right in the palm of my hand. I had finally stumbled upon the final solution, that in my mind, formed the dagger fit enough to slay the beast who had been unrelentingly pestering my inner conscious. I am, and always will be, the creator of my own destiny, and no one's opinions of me or my own bitter views of myself will hold me back from being the soulful individual that I am. No longer will I spend the best of my nights endlessly torturing myself into self pity, but instead, I will see the luminous positives I am thankfully blessed with. With this new found assurance and confidence I had unearthed from within; the soothing lullabies of the tranquil night beckoned me to submit to the peaceful abyss and my tired eyes fluttered closed to the twinkling of the heavens stars.