I wear a mask to stay here

Or at least, to continue the illusion that I am here

There are things one can do

That make it so impossibly hard to be here

Things that drown you

Drown you so much you almost start to feel your gills evolving

Coaxing you to go ever deeper

But the despair that comes with going so far in

Makes the shore seem so inviting

And yet you wouldn't be human if you just left this sea behind

You end up frolicking ungracfully in the break

Pounded by the crashing waves

Calling for help, but questioning wether you'd take help if it really did come

Some times

The tide stays low

So low you think that the mask isn't needed anymore

That you really can be here and now

And not just the illusion of such groundedness

But then the waves come crashing down again

Or maybe just lapping at your ankles,

Their icy touch trying to sink you deep in the sand

The rip current that topples you backwards

and farther from the dry sand of the present