It hurt to see her hurting.
I couldn’t understand the pain that she was feeling,
but the look in her eyes was different since the pain overtook her.

I didn’t see the light that I saw flickering in her eyes when I first meet her.
Though she smiled,
and went about her days doing the same things she did all her life,
there was a difference in each action she made.
Each step was a little less upbeat,
each laugh a little more forced,
each word a little softer,
and each cry a little louder.

She was still the same person,
but it was as if a new layer of skin grew around her,
making it harder for her to be who she wanted to be,
without caring about the obstacles in her way.
A little harder for her to choose not to feel the pain.

No love could rid her of the scars already left.
No touch from me could
save,
touch,
or reach her.
It overtook her and took away the joy in the simplest things.
She used to smile,
And each time she smiled, she laughed under her breath.
But now smiling took as much effort as climbing a mountain.
And each time you would hug her,
It felt like her body would fall into billions of pieces.

I never understood the concept of losing someone before they were gone,
until I loved her.
She used to run,
She used to sing,
She used to blast the music way too  loud in the car,
And I used to laugh at her goofball nature,
but I never knew there would be a day when all of those moments
would just become apart of a memorial speech to her.

She was young, beautiful, and had so much ahead of her,
but something cruel had to make a girl who cried over the sight of roadkill,
become the roadkill herself.
She was only gonna be here for a short time,
but she will be leaving footprints behind with her battered feet,
And once she was gone,
they would just cover her with dirt,
hiding her beauty and strength,
And she would become what she was before birth.

It was on this morning,
while I was looking at her,
With the sun hitting her in just the right place,
that I knew that she didn’t want to be on this earth anymore.
That she just wanted the pain to go away,
and it was all in the way her eyes appeared,
that I knew.