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The Phases of Life
I can't wait to grow up! Today I fell and skinned my knee,
I tried to be brave, but I couldn't stop the tears.
Grownups are so strong, they never cry!
They aren't afraid of the dark and they aren't shy.
Mom asked me what makes me happy, I told her everything!
Happiness is like my pretty doll, if i lose it i keep looking and looking.
Last year, letters were like shiny beads flung in my mind,
and now I can make pretty jewelry, reading hundreds of lines!
Yesterday, I counted all the stars in the sky!
I told my daddy and he said I was one of a kind.
I can do anything I want to, and there's so much I want to do!
I want to fly, change the world, and meet Winnie the Pooh!
The weather was warm and the smiley sun was watching me all day,
but I miss the grumpy clouds, because i love playing in the rain!
I have to sleep now; I hate sleep!
Why can't I stay awake forever, to play and read?
I can't believe I'm finally a teen.
What’s changed? What's not changed over the years?
Before, I heard of sadness but never felt him in my heart.
Now he is like the uncle that comes once a year then quickly departs.
It's raining outside and my soul is screaming to be freed,
to dance with the raindrops and skip in the puddles with glee.
But I can't, I have to hate the rain, like everyone else my age.
I can't sleep; the questions of tomorrow always keep me awake.
There are no boundaries to my imagination;
dreams come to me like stallions fueled with determination.
I prance through my kingdoms, fantasies of everything I will achieve.
Today I dared do look over the beautiful castle walls to see…
Darkness. Hatred. War. Poverty.
Why was I ever born into such a horrible reality?
I am forever waiting for my dreams, but they continue to stall.
I stand on the edges of hope, any fragile step will make me fall.
Loneliness is a cup flung in my hand by ungracious fate
and I'm forced to sip again and again , swallowing its bitter taste.
I miss the days I would climb my dreams like an apple tree,
too busy to enjoy the beauty of the view to feel any fear.
If I fell, I scampered back up without hesitating.
Now fear of failure clamps its arms around my neck, choking.
When I was small I used to play pretend, but it was just a game;
now, everyone I know pretends, but they don't realize they're fake.
I drew my ambitions too hard… my papers ripped.
I colored my notebooks everyday, and broke all the crayons of happiness.
Sleep brings me dreams which are my only escape.
I despise the rain, it does nothing but echo my sadness and pain.
To trust or be honest is considered gullibility,
and innocence and kindness to others is stupidity.
Now I know adults are more confused than anyone,
afraid of their inner darkness, wishing to be numb.
I look at the stars and something inside me dies;
the universe is so big and I'm just a nobody, why even try?
I've been through enough to understand life,
I don't have an answer to every question, but I have a bit of insight.
I live by the motto: every tear has an ending,
and every ending brings a smile. That's the beat of living.
We cannot help but dance to it, no matter how the tempo changes.
I choose to see the goodness in life, not the ugliness and pain.
I am still young and have a long way to go,
but I know for a fact I will survive and I am never alone;
I always have inside me that stubborn little girl,
who searches for happiness and wants to change the world.