Adieu to Summer | Teen Ink

Adieu to Summer

December 24, 2010
By PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"


The wind is blowing cooler than before
The sun is beginning to fade today
And hearts of children playing melt away

The Seasons switch from left to right quickly
And saddening days come when snow blows down
A terrible sight to see white blankets
As they do cover the whole troubled town

They snuff and sneer as shovels come to work
They pile snow onto the lawns and scowl
The cars get stuck and people shovel out

The snow came late so children are in school
No playing here; they have to stay and learn
A scream is not in sight; laughter has gone
No marks are left from sleds or boots in town

Alls quiet till’ the time of day has come
The bell will ring and children laugh and run
The fun is finally here for today


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This article has 22 comments.


on Jan. 23 2011 at 2:20 pm
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

Thanks and i'll make sure to check out some of your work!! :)

on Jan. 20 2011 at 9:31 am
Chitra.I PLATINUM, Dubai, Other
44 articles 2 photos 131 comments

Favorite Quote:
Everything makes sense if you think too much about it.

Imagery is your talent. Good work. =)

I'd appreciate it if you checked out some of my work too...like 'Ive stopped being scared'..feedback will be welcomed! =)


on Jan. 6 2011 at 11:22 pm
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

I'm glad you liked it! :)

on Jan. 4 2011 at 11:47 pm
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

i don't think so... I wrote it to be free verse it just happens to rhyme in a few spots!! :)

on Jan. 4 2011 at 11:46 pm
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

Thanks!! :)

on Jan. 3 2011 at 12:11 am
very good word choice throughout. this creates a very good image in my head. good!

on Jan. 2 2011 at 10:41 pm
stubborn411 GOLD, Jamiaca, New York
13 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nothing is impossible, just highly improbable

This piece is very detailed. I like the way you explained the seasons as they switch from Summer to Winter. Very pretty

Brother12 said...
on Jan. 2 2011 at 3:20 pm
Pretty Good! Is this a haiku or some type of special writing type of poem??? It really flows in the beginning!! At the end it gets a little choppy, but is pretty good! I enjoyed reading this!! 

on Jan. 2 2011 at 2:43 am
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

Thanks! And Colorado was what inspired me to write this! :):)

on Jan. 2 2011 at 2:42 am
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

Thanks and i like that i'll think about changing the ending to make it flow more! I appreciate you commenting and helping me to improve my writing! :):)

on Jan. 2 2011 at 2:40 am
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

Thanks for the ideas! I wasn't even trying to rhyme, but i guess i happened to rhyme most of it :):)

on Jan. 2 2011 at 2:38 am
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

THANKS! That's a good point! I'll need to go back and revise it a little! :) :)

on Jan. 2 2011 at 2:37 am
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

Thanks! And i was happy to here that you saved it as a favorite!! :):)

on Jan. 2 2011 at 2:36 am
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

Thanks! I appreciate the positive comment! :) :)

on Dec. 31 2010 at 9:57 pm
Kbuschan PLATINUM, South Plainfield, New Jersey
25 articles 0 photos 64 comments

Favorite Quote:
Fall in love or fall in hate; Get inspired or be depressed; Ace a test or flunk a class; Make babies or make art; Speak the truth or lie and cheat; Dance on tables or sit in the corner; Life is divine chaos. Embrace it. Breathe. And enjoy the ride...

nice i like your play on words and the description of the things going on to describem the changing season

lizzy1002 GOLD said...
on Dec. 31 2010 at 6:10 pm
lizzy1002 GOLD, Palm Bay, Florida
13 articles 0 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
" I rather die for somthing then live for nothing"-Unknown

I loved it its long and well thought out ....i am going to save this page as  my faveorit ( i think i spelled that word wrong my bad ) keep up the good wrok beacues i want to read more of ur poems !

on Dec. 31 2010 at 1:44 pm
PerfectMGymnast DIAMOND, Parker, Colorado
57 articles 25 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you don't leap you'lll never know what it's like to fly"

Thankyou everyone for the comments! It has really helped me to know what I need to improve on in my writing!! :) :)

on Dec. 31 2010 at 11:25 am
Got_Interest GOLD, Arnold, Maryland
17 articles 8 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Box falls out of sky, man falls out of box, man eats fish custard, and look at you- you're just sitting there."
-Matt Smith as The Doctor

Very good. I like your use of Imagery here. I can picture the school, the town, and the children

on Dec. 31 2010 at 9:26 am
sunnyhunny PLATINUM, Litchfield, New Hampshire
22 articles 3 photos 329 comments

Favorite Quote:
"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."
-Ghandi

I really like this!  It tells a story that many of us experience in our own ways each year.  I would work on trying to make it flow a little better, though.  I noticed that initially you tried to make it rhyme, but then you kind of stopped.  I think it sounded best when it was rhymimg.  Also, Maybe try having each verse be the same amount of lines.  Just some ideas, really nice job.

on Dec. 30 2010 at 10:48 pm
Donttrust BRONZE, Fort Collins, Colorado
1 article 2 photos 44 comments
I love it :) I'd just like to say....it's obvious your from Colorado :) and its really good I love love the first stanza


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